Going Down (Part II)

[Reiner Dornkirk]

Although the private was embarrassed by the lieutenant's initial response, Kuno would find Reiner to be an apt pupil. Even more than usual, he was a quick and curious study, because this was an area of particular interest. His eagerness lent to his retention. He got over his embarrassment quickly enough, and he wasn't even as shy as usual around the airmen Kuno oversaw. He didn't initiate conversations with them, but he would participate when engaged, if he didn't get dirty looks from the lieutenant.

Reiner enjoyed his third square meal of the day, and was talkative over dinner. Even though they'd spent the whole day together, he seemed to find no dearth of topics to broach. He wondered whether Commander Lang waxed his mustache, whether Captain Merovech approved of his appointment, whether the weather would be as windy on the morrow, and much more. From small talk to big talk, he passed the time between bites, and the time it took Kuno to finish what was on his tray, because he was a slower diner.

Sauntering back into their cabin, the chatty foot soldier headed over to fetch the beer opener.

"Age before beauty." He acknowledged as he grabbed Kuno's bottle and snapped the cap off for him, before doing the same for himself.

"Here's to teamwork! Couldn't have tamed the bear without you." He flattered with a clink of glass against glass, before taking a swig and plopping down on his bed to untie his boots.

"So, what do you want to do for the rest of the night? I guess we could play cards or something, or... Well, maybe you want a break from me after spending all the live long day with me talking your ear off." That wasn't entirely true. He'd been quite reticent when he was shadowing the lieutenant.

"Or... y'know, if you need to be along to uh... take care of yourself or whatever, I can take a walk." He shrugged one shoulder and tugged the first boot off unceremoniously.

[Rune]

The older man let the younger carry the conversation through dinner, absorbing the information he was getting, both from the words that were spoken and what things unspoken could be garnered. Learning Reiner, initially, had been easy, but the more time he spent with the private the more he realized that there were things less easily understood under the surface.

Most people fell pretty easily into basic categories as far as motivation, desires and fears went, making it easy for Kuno to play on them when he needed things. Reiner's own motivation and desires, even his fears, seemed straight forward, but for some reason, this did not translate into him acting the way Kuno expected all the time. Most of the time he did, most of the time it was easy as breathing between them to the point when Kuno didn't even both trying to manipulate the situation. But, once in a while, even when he was trying, things went in a direction he hadn't expected. The notion that this might be because Kuno himself was involved emotionally in the friendship did not occur.

When they were back in their cabin he relinquished his beer to Reiner's attentions without hesitation, murmuring,

"Damn right." At the little joke about his age and Reiner's beauty. It wasn't an incorrect assessment, anyway.

Reaching out a languid hand he took a long pull, holding the last of it in his mouth till he could feel the alcohol beginning to work on him. It had been a good day. It felt like it had been a good day too. Some days were good but, by the end of them when he tried to relax, he couldn't. This was not one of those and, he realized, he hadn't had one of them since he'd sort of kidnapped Reiner into being his roommate. The idea that that little piece of knowledge might get back to the other man didn't worry him. If that Dienerin fellow informed Reiner for some reason Kuno could believably explain that he had misunderstood and was fairly sure that Reiner wouldn't abandon him now. Not for a while, anyway. The rest of the apartment building they occupied the top of was now taken up by other soldiers, some sharing, so it wasn't even as if their accommodations were worse than those of their counterparts.

After the complimentary toast he set his bottle on the ground to follow the private's example and remove the boots he'd been wearing since early that morning. The socks he left on because the floor was still cold. The truth was, he wanted to sleep. Two nights ago he'd gotten no real, good, sleep, and the last night he'd stayed up working with Reiner and then risen early to ensure all went according to their plans. But, it seemed that his companion was energized by learning, and triumph, so Kuno pulled himself into a more social mindset. His face took on a look that was as close to imperious as he could manage and he draped one hand over his breast, saying,

"As I have told you, I take care of my own self in the showers, so as not to leave my... leavings all about the room." He had not actually found Reiner's 'leavings' but he assumed that there was some garment now decorated with the private's expulsions hiding in his duffel.

Once his boots were off he stood and took the two steps over to his chest from whence he pulled a pack of cards.

"I suppose I could teach you a few more things before I let your brain rest."

Removing the cards from the pack he shuffled expertly while sitting back down as though he were used to doing it while in motion, on a ship that was also in motion. He, in fact, was.

"What would you like to play for?" He shuffled again before beginning to deal, one stack on his bed and one on its opposite. "Money seems sort of pointless under the current circumstances." Not to mention the fact that Kuno hadn't brought any.

"I suppose that leaves forfeits, eh? Unless you'd like to get me out of this uniform." He grinned and picked up his own cards, assuming he'd just win enough that Reiner would be left handling the chores for a while.

[Reiner Dornkirk]

Between the sips and swigs, Reiner removed his boots, jacket and outer shirt, replacing his uniform slacks with loungewear. He did remove the thin socks he'd worn all day, but replaced them with a thicker, woolen pair that fared better against the cold floor. He glanced up sharply.

The private blushed profusely at the implications presented by Kuno's comment about their respective 'self-care' regimens, so to speak. He immediately assumed Kuno had somehow noticed what little had streaked its way onto his pillow after he concluded his overlong abstinence.

He furrowed his brow and used his free hand to cover his flushed face. There was really nothing to say that would excuse the faux-pas he thought he'd been caught in, so he was happy to move on to talk of cards. Hopefully, Kuno could go back to pretending nothing had been amiss.

"Heh, you can keep your clothes on. There's nothing under that uniform I haven't seen as your roommate and," He rolled his eyes, "Obviously I don't swing that way. I know I'm pretty, but that don't make me a poofter." They played around a lot, of course, but that tease coming on the heels of their talk of taking care of themselves... and the way Reiner himself had finished on an intrusive thought about Kuno... he got noticeably defensive. Typically he'd play it off, or give it right back when they were alone together, but not this time.

"We can play for whatever you want." He shrugged, sliding from the edge of his bed down onto the floor between the two bunks. "I already do most of the chores..." Reiner had started because he felt bad for turning his solo living situation into a duo, and then when Kuno had been promoted it seemed more appropriate. He also just didn't really mind it. He'd grown up helping out around the house and when that pattern elided so smoothly into barrack life, it just became second nature to clean up after himself and others.

He was tempted to request a back rub for his prize, but thought better of it. He likely would have posed that, if not for Kuno's recent insinuations, but instead he said: "How about if I win, I'm the lieutenant and you're the private when we're alone for a whole week?"

[Rune]

The intense blush that followed his accusation of Reiner making a mess while tossing himself off was all the confirmation Kuno needed and more. It was also confirmation that the other man was deeply embarrassed concerning sexual matters, or at least the ones that did not earn one bragging rights. Why this might be he could only guess. Growing up an only child likely accounted for it, having been afforded privacy during his formative years and such. Kuno hadn't been given the room to relieve those urges that came on with adolescence in privacy, but by then his older cousins had already demonstrated that, in such circumstances, one did what one must and everyone else attempted to ignore it.

As he'd gotten older, during the times when survival wasn't in jeopardy enough that pretending to pass on his family name was not deemed important enough to waste energy on, he'd found secluded places that, while not under a roof, offered more actual privacy than any roof he was allowed to be under would have.

Kuno leaned over so he was slightly shorter than Reiner and looked up at him making a parody of a child's pleading face,

"Oh! Must I?" Before standing up and removing his own coat and both shirts below it till his torso was bare. When he was in his own version of sleeping trousers and socks he flopped down on his bed and took back up his hand of cards, exchanging the one he didn't want for one he did in a feat of slight of hand he was so used to doing he himself didn't even notice that he had until his eyes fell on his hand as he splayed it out.

The little insult, though Reiner was not aware that it had been an insult to Kuno, was enough reason to take the first game from the other man. How the night went after would be determined by which things Kuno wanted to win and which he wanted to 'lose'. When the private slid to the floor he followed, sitting with his back against his bunk to support it and his legs crossed in front of him.

The suggested prize made him chuckle and eye the other man,

"Won't be long before you outrank me all the time." He said, but it wasn't an objection, "And if I win, you can rub the knots out of me that two days on light sleep rations for your sake have earned, eh?"

[Reiner Dornkirk]

Reiner narrowed his eyes slightly at Kuno's playacting. It didn't feel properly, well... playful. Letting out a sigh and deciding the chalk it up as another facet of the airman's eccentricities, the private waited for him to undress for his own comfort, rather than Reiner's pleasure. As it should be, he thought, starting to raise his bottle of lager, before taking a look at the contents, and deciding he was drinking too fast and ought to ration.

"You got promoted within days of my knowing you, Kuno..." Reiner softened a bit. He, too, felt a bit insulted by their prior exchange. He recognized that he was being irrational and that Kuno was just playing by the usual rules, but for some reason the taunt had struck a different nerve this time. Things had changed for Reiner, since his little malfunction the other evening when he'd been consoling Kuno after his night terror. He was more sensitive about the perception that his interest in his friend might be more than fraternal.

"I doubt I'll ever outrank you. I think this mission has proven that I'm good at taking orders and keeping my head in tense situations, but it doesn't mean I'd be any good at giving orders. You're the one who came up with our whole game plan, I just executed. You're real officer material. The brass saw that, and that's why you're a lieutenant. Me? I'm a glorified messenger boy. And even for that I need your help." Now he wasn't being flattering for the sake of Kuno's pride, it was more a means of self-deprecation than uplifting the other this time.

Reiner arched an eyebrow when Kuno proposed the same prize he'd just decided to jettison, lest he come across as having lascivious intent toward his roommate. Was Kuno just more comfortable, or...? He shuddered. It was no good dwelling on something like that. Kämpfer was just eccentric. He was an airman, used to being cooped up on ships like this for extended periods. That did something to a person, he reckoned. It didn't mean a massage was anything more than the remedy to a sore back. He had one, too, after all. It wasn't like there was an abundance of women on the ship ready to oil up their hands to tend to either of their shoulders. And it would be better for both of them, if their muscles were on their side for the missions to come.

"Fine." Reiner sighed, "But no happy ending." He suppressed a smirk, and sipped his beer as he waited for Kuno to elaborate on what game they'd be playing.

[Rune]

As they went through the motions of the card game Kuno's demeanor towards the man sitting close enough that their legs were almost touching. The compliments helped, that they seemed genuine helped more. He knew that his promotion had been entirely due to the circumstances under which what remained of the government found itself. However well he had comported himself during the disaster itself and consequent time spent on the ground, the same level of action would not have earned him his promotion had it simply been in the course of his normal duty to the State. That he had been singled out among his fellows, along with several others, was, he knew, likely partially due to the luck of the fact that he had been in the close quarter fighting with the Minister himself on several occasions, but significantly more likely because this young private, through a fluke of blood connecting him to those in power, and decided he was worth a mention.

There was a possibility he'd have gotten it anyway, but he did not see a coincidence in the fact that two days after Reiner had sung his praises he'd been presented with new pins for his jacket. Tilting his head a little in his habitual way when he was curious he said,

"Do you mean that? You don't see yourself giving orders, leading other men?"

That Reiner now seemed to be talking himself down from his momentary pique only meant that Kuno was spared having to do it himself, which was always preferred. Why it was that the man continued to bringing up sexual humor when it also seemed to irritate or embarrass him, the lieutenant did not know. Even when he himself saw that it was upsetting and dropped it, the private kept throwing out little bits of it as though to...

Oh. As thought to prove he had no feelings in that direction. Sharp, green eyes moved to scan over the too-pretty face across from his under the guise of looking over his cards. Had the incident the other night had more of an effect than Kuno had imagined? Many men became overly defensive when their weaknesses were exposed, and, if Reiner's was the same as Kuno's... Well, the older man knew just how much danger there was; how very necessary hiding and defending such a need was. His body still bore scars of the times, in his teenager years, before he'd joined the ZADC, that he'd been caught expressing his attractions.

The notion that Reiner might have experienced similar, or even just witnessed what happened to men of their sort, made the muscles in Kuno's hands tighten. The desire for his own revenge was never so strong as that he harbored for those men he had spent time with who had later been made to pay for what they needed in their own blood. Yet, the idea also softened a knot inside Kuno that had formed instantly over his attraction to Reiner as soon as they'd met. If it was possible that they were the same...

There was a lot of possibility there. If Kuno wanted to try to get what he knew he wanted, what there might be a possibility of, well, he would have all the power in the situation, even more so than he did now, and he would also have...

His eyes graced over Reiner's beautiful face, his form, in one quick sweep. It was something else to think of later, when he was alone.

Laying his cards down before him showing a winning hand he said, in a slightly apologetic tone.

"You don't actually have to rub me down if you'd rather not. I am sore, but I was teasing, I want to be here, helping however I can." His smile was a little bit of a question, like a dog wagging its tail only slightly to see if you were upset with it but also not very worried that you were.

[Reiner Dornkirk]

"I do!" Reiner protested Kuno's interpretation promptly, "Of course I see myself as a leader down the line, but I think I've got a lot of learning to do, whereas you're already so poised and self-assured. I know you've got a few years on me, but... that's all the more reason I think you'll stay ahead of me rank-wise." He wrinkled his nose a bit and shrugged, turning his attention to the cards in his hands.

If Kuno had asked Reiner outright why he teased about the matters he himself was most sensitive about, he'd have been hard pressed to offer an intelligible answer. He wasn't making a conscious choice to deflect or project things onto Kuno, it was just sort of opportunistic to him. It made him feel like he was keeping up with the other man. He liked to remind Kuno that he could be clever and funny. He'd always relied on humor to charm his friends into keeping him around. He wasn't cognizant of any strategy Kuno might perceive him to be employing. To be strategic, he'd have had to have been aware that there was something to hide. Reiner still saw the incident of the other night as a fluke. He truly believed Kuno's assertions that it was normal. He believed his own argument that he'd been pent up from his extended chastity. It was an odd, emotional time for every Zaichaeri survivor. It stood to reason that trauma would present itself in queer novel ways. But that didn't mean he was going through any sort of internal crisis about his sexuality. Reiner still very much considered himself a straight, red-blooded, Zaichaeri man who would settle down with a nice, humble, human woman and have a brood of new Dornkirks to help their cousin branch pave the path to a brighter tomorrow.

He spent most of the time during this game with his eyes on his cards. He was still learning the ropes of this game, and only some of the strategies were immediately obvious. He didn't want to miss opportunities, and so he remained very focused in ways that the more experienced Kuno might not have needed to.

"Hrm." Reiner grunted and grimaced, as he stared at the losing hand he'd placed on the floor between them. At least he understood the game enough to realize without being told that he'd lost this first salvo. He didn't seem thrilled, but he took it in stride, forcing a smile to supplant the scowl that had answered his loss initially.

"A deal's a deal, Kuno." He said, leaning forward to sweep up his cards and place them on the stack. As far as Reiner was concerned, he'd agreed to the terms and he would stick to them. He pressed his palms to the floor and pushed himself up, soft steps evading Kuno's cards en route to his bed. He crawled onto the mattress, and turned back around so he could slide toward Kuno and hang his feet over the edge- one on either side of his roommate. With Kuno sandwiched between his legs, Reiner leaned forward the grip hold of the muscle between his neck and his shoulder.

"Whoa, you weren't kidding about those knots, were you?" Reiner noted immediately, with a little chuckle as he dug his thumbs in to knead those trouble spots, pinching his forefinger in and setting an identical pace to the massage on either side of his neck. He looked down at Kuno's straight, dark hair. He was close enough that he could smell the way the military issue shampoo blended with his natural musk, and he didn't dislike it. It smelled like warmth at bedtime. Increasingly it smelled like home.

"Kuno?" Reiner began, and there was a crack of the vulnerable in the rasp of his tenor voice. "I just want to say that... I feel really lucky you got assigned to take care of me that first day. You've become a really good friend, and I feel like without you, I might have just floated off into the clouds never to be heard from again." He snickered, awkwardly, and cleared his throat as he tightened his grip to knead more forcefully.

[Rune]

The fantasy that had just began to form of Reiner asking to remain at his current rank, of Kuno continuing to rise and always requesting the PFC on his staff to follow him around as they worked together to put the world back together, fell to glittering motes inside his imagination. It had been a pretty little dream, but very short lived and thus not much mourned when it was instantly shattered. Ah well, they could rise together, so long as Kuno could keep one step ahead. He would need the advantage if he hoped to keep up now that Reiner had connected with the de facto leader of the State.

The notion to wonder if they would have connected had he met Reiner with a different last name, or at least before he'd had a realistic chance of connecting with the highest branch on his family tree. Watching the other man's look of defeated irritation, Kuno thought they might well have been friends if they'd ever had the unlikely luck to serve together for more than the time it took to transport Reiner's company on whatever ship Kuno would have been assigned to. It was oddly comforting to think that their connection was not wholly based on the chances for advancement it offered him, and he gave the private a thankful smile over his shoulder as the other man settled, warm, tucked around him to either side.

This was not how he'd imagined getting between Reiner's legs. Not that he'd actually intentionally imagined any such thing, but flashes came to him once in a while when he was taking himself in hand under the lukewarm water they got for showers in their apartment. The water on the Gambit was as hot as he could stand it, which was a nice change considering that Frost was fast approaching.

The strong grip on his bare neck and shoulders made him wince at first, but at least he was able to keep quiet about it. Keeping quite was a skill he'd learned around the time he'd been weaned and it had served him well ever sense. When Reiner spoke again and his voice sounded different Kuno glanced back again, not really able to see his friend's face but using the gesture to show that he was listening without the need to interrupt.

He let all the words that were coming come out, punctuated by even more strength being pressed into his muscles, but at least they were warmed up and ready to take it now. Not examining his motivations or emotions he reached out one hand and wrapped it lightly around Reiner's calf, giving it a squeeze that was like an imitation of a hug, or the shadow of one that acknowledged what was being said and returned the sentiment without having to go through anything so intimate as an actual hug.

"I am too. I was..." His own voice fought not to show emotion, "I wasn't in a great place, in my head, after everything that happened in the city. I was putting a brave face on it, soldier on, all that. It's important, I know but inside... not so great. I'm not sure what it was about meeting you but I guess it sort of grounded me."

He laughed, a short sound of amusement at his own unintended joke,

"Ground pounder that you are, I suppose, eh?"

[Reiner Dornkirk]

Reiner smiled to himself at the squeeze to his calf. It was affirming enough to serve as an answer in its own right, even if Kuno hadn't seen fit to proffer a verbal response. In truth, the private didn't expect to get that much from the lieutenant and he was surprised by the words offered him in reply. He'd just finished saying how poised Kuno seemed and, even if he didn't want it for his friend, there was something comforting in knowing that at least some of it was a façade.

He supposed he might have guessed as much. It wasn't as though his roommate was totally unflappable. He'd snapped at Reiner, and rather blown up at him about the whole thing with Renata back on the Islands. Then, of course, there was the night terror and the sobbing that pursued it. He might have seen chinks in the panzer had he been looking for them, but he wasn't usually. He saw his friend and thought of the quick, easy way he moved through a crowd, or drew attention to himself or both of them in a way that seemed more charming than obtrusive. The public Kuno projected such confidence, and so did most of the private Kuno. When that air lapsed it felt more like an intrusion than anything. As if someone was interloping and posing at his buddy- a possession, not an aspect of the person he'd grown to like so much.

"You're takin' my line, Kuno..." He chuckled, "I'm supposed to be the buoy. You're the anchor..." He trailed off, letting his fingers serve as infantry trekking the landscape of Kuno's muscles at a stark, steady march. He hadn't spent much time in his life studying the male physique, certainly not in any tactile sense. He'd appreciated a man with a solid build, a sculpted physique and all that. It was what a soldier aspired to. Reiner certainly did, though he'd never come close. But Kuno's form was softer than some bodybuilders. It was more like his own. He'd never really thought about how soft a man's skin could be under his hands. With his face tipped down, his soft hair tumbling forward and his smooth flesh under plying palms, he didn't seem so different from a girl.

Reiner winced, but it didn't effect the ministrations of his hands. He could feel a stirring. It was happening again. Before things got any worse, he paused his work and patted Kuno's shoulders, sliding his hands away to adjust his pants quickly.

"You get enough?" The private sat back a bit and drew one of his legs up onto the bed with him. "I could probably stand to hit the hay. I'm starting to feel how bad I've slept the past few nights..."

[Rune]

"Buoyant, you are, I'll give you that." The tease was gentle, something shared rather than something used to push them apart. "Effervescent almost. But an anchor needs a buoy, dunnit? No purpose otherwise, eh?"

They could give each other reasons to do what they did, or ground each other, or any of another dozen metaphors for the fact that they did better together than they did apart. How it was described mattered less to the man sitting on the floor enjoying the warmth and companionship, both physically and otherwise, of a friend. What people he might have used the term for back home were more than likely dead, or, even more likely, worse than dead. He had been close to a few blokes here and there but his career hadn't been very settled. His commanders often did not like his generalized popularity and found excuses to have him reassigned. At other times the missions had been short term things where everyone was reassigned afterwards to new units. His posting at the Windworks in the months after the coup and before the 34th hadn't been his longest, but it had been one of them. Due to it's nature, which was just standing guard silently or else running missives alone, he hadn't grown close to the other men from the ZADC assigned to the same work. It was something he was grateful for later, as he'd watched them be torn apart or turn into the things doing the tearing, before his eyes.

So, he realized, it could be said that Reiner was his only friend. Granted, it could also be said that the majority of the people he interacted with even semi-regularly on the Islands could be called his friends. Shared tragedy and trauma were the best form of social glue. Even if he was gone for years and came back he suspected the bartenders who had lifted off with him would still stand him a drink, the women who'd been girls his own age would likely give him a hug and the men shake his hand. It was the sort of tug that you couldn't ignore, which helped when you'd lost everything else. So many people had lost the majority of their families that new ones were forming and not all of them were the traditional sort formed by marriages. There had been some of those, but fewer than their might have been had not most of the factory worker families survived intact. Which meant that there were living fathers to protect their traumatized daughters from equally traumatized soldiers looking for comfort in each other's arms. This left the dating pool open, which left Kuno with options when he wanted to cover his ass or take a girl in hers, assuming he was wise enough to chose a girl who was more afraid of what would happen to her if she told her father than of enduring Kuno's desires.

The direction of his thoughts, in combination with the touch he was receiving, was causing a reaction in the older man, but not so intense a one as to give evidence to any eyes that happened to glance down. A comfortable mild arousal wasn't a problem.

"Right as rain!" He replied, genuinely grateful for both the attentive massage and is cessation for the time being.

"Not up for another hand?" He nodded to the cards scattered on the floor, "You can win your own turn, unless you're still obsessed with the idea of me saluting and calling you 'Sir!' for a whole week?"