Just Mossin' Around [Æros]

[Hilana Chenzira]

When he tentatively asked about the possibility of an initiation from her sisters, Hilana shook her head. “That is correct. They would have done it quite happily to please our father, but that would have been decidedly unwise of me. I can’t say they would have been particularly good teachers, I’ve seen how they’re raising their children, unfortunately,” the girl tried to make light of it. “No, and for the best. It was a good suggestion, though,” she didn’t want to offend him - he was being kind to her and offering solutions, and shooting them down without any level of consideration was just insulting and flat out disrespectful to someone who was at least taking the time to try to help her. That she said it would be unwise of her to take a Rune added yet another piece of the puzzle, or just further complicated the whole situation and made it seem even stranger. Her father was apparently in full support of her acquiring a Rune, but that entrenched bitterness and spite...

This was a girl who made things hard for herself, and no matter how difficult she made her own situation, she would slog through it until she accomplished her goals. Mundane in a world that prized magic, where everyone praised arcana and used it in the most casual situations, and was a prerequisite for nearly any level of social advancement, status, and value... and the girl wouldn’t do it. Maybe it was that she was content, but Aeros’ ability with his Mesmer had already told him that it wasn’t from a dislike of magic itself, and she had admitted the value of what Elementalism could do for her... it all circled back to her father and whatever was going on there.

That he might go out on a limb for her like that, to approach a family member of his on her behalf... that surprised her, he could tell, and she was touched. It was unexpected, and not something she expected - that he would go out of his way to see about arranging something like that for her... “That is very kind of you to offer,” she bowed her head to him. “I wouldn’t want to inconvenience you or your family, though,” the girl straightened. But if such a thing could have been done at a few hours or so once a week, or shorter sessions depending on their schedule... that... that could work. That way she could continue working and just fit it in to accommodate... “I’ve never heard tell of anyone having four or five Runes,” Hilana admitted. “So if you could, Dominus, that would be considerable, I would think. Right up there with the Royals, no?” she offered him an encouraging smile. That sort of thing was meant for people like him... not her.

She shook her head when he told her that he was surprised people let it happen. “There’s an awful lot of people that think they know everything there is to know on a subject. Especially amongst my Caste,” she sounded wry. Equestrians were famous for puffery, and amongst their own, it was probably even worse. There were limits to how far humans could go with elves, after all, but amongst their own... the girl had stories for days.

She understood needing a physical outlet of some sort. “That’s what I’m used to,” Hilana chuckled. “Physical work, exercise. Climbing, running, riding, managing the herds, dancing… movement. But city living… with my father’s expectations…” she shook her head. “I lived in the Sands for most of my years, although my father dragged us to Tertium after my mother passed. Short of using a Mesmer, I wouldn’t settle down…and his parents and my Great Aunt didn’t approve of it and shamed him, because it’s just Wildness, and that is a part of our culture. So I was sent back out with others when I was four. I had to come back a few years ago to begin my apprenticeship. He wouldn’t let me do it with one of the nomadic tribes, since he doesn't want me making connections and forging my own relationships that he may not approve of," her tone got a bit dryer, but she managed to keep herself from becoming downright caustic. "My Great Aunt, she is a herbalist too. So she started teaching me in Tertium.” There were more clues as to the fight with her father in that explanation. Being restrained, fighting against him like a wild animal being dragged by ropes to a fate it didn’t want… But there was respect, love, and care for this Great Aunt, mixed with a great deal of admiration and awe.

At his inquiry about her interest in alchemy, she could at least affirm that. “After our first meeting at the start of the season, I got a bit curious about Runeforging,” Hilana admitted. “We do have a number of them in here, as you can see,” she indicated the arrays overhead. “And then I ran into this stoneborn gnome, Aardwalden, in the Umbrium. He was very excited about the subject, so I went and found a book on world magic disciplines to learn more about it... and there’s a section on alchemy. I haven’t had much time to really get into the book, since I just got it the other day and I think we’ve all been quite busy with the Equinox... but it seemed to me that alchemy could be very valuable for both herbalism and poisons.” The casualness of the way she said the last word showed she had some confidence on that subject, too, beyond just being a herbalist that could heal and treat with natural and normal medicines. “Especially since such an emblem like Mendicus is blasphemy here. Plus... no Rune,” her lips quirked in a small smile. No evidence.

But as he spoke about crystallization, her eyes got wide with surprise. She didn’t interrupt, listening ardently to this intriguing fact. “I did not know that, no. Must one’s arch element be earth for that to occur?” She inquired. “Or is that open to all elementalists, regardless of their arch element?” Hilana was deeply curious now. Imagine being able to create something akin to Dragonshards... She knew a bit of the basics; but more in-depth knowledge such as this was quite new to her. The Vastii did understand about arch elements, at least, but considering she had multiple family members with the rune, it was no surprise that she was familiar with that aspect. But knowing the intricacies... And as curious as she was, it was complicated. It wasn’t as simple as just doing it. Not knowing what the consequences of doing so were for her.

She was shaking her head in commiseration as he spoke about his mother and her need to control things. That she knew all too well. Her father was the same; exerting control over everything that he could because he’d lost it once, and he wouldn’t go back to it. But in doing so, he was going to lose her, and Hilana already knew that she was somewhat of a lost cause to him at this point. What mattered to him was using her as yet another piece on the chessboard to expand his business and keep her firmly under his foot. “I am sorry that they put that pressure on you, Dominus. I hope that you’ve been able to get respite from that situation, and that you are able to find some peace and freedom. I can imagine that with such titles comes equally lofty expectations and an awful lot of pressure.” It was perhaps strange to speak of freedom in their culture, where the truth of the matter was, all of them were slaves to something. That was Domina Varvara’s stance. But for those of them who fought the bit, fought the reins, fought the halter... All they could do was fight or give in. Hilana had had to pretend to give in for a few years. Let him think he had won. That she had cracked and broken and acquiesced to the situation the way he wanted her to. It had gotten her some respite, and now she had to figure out her next steps from here. But she had time. She had until likely Searing, her great aunt had said, but maybe that could be stretched out...

The way he spoke of the man of his affections brought a small, soft smile to her face, her eyes on him. She had meant it earlier when she said there wasn’t hardly enough affection shown in this world, and as such she always loved to see it when it happened. But the way her eyes danced and her shoulders quaked briefly with a suppressed chuckle suggested Hilana got his meaning there, and if it was the person she was thinking of, then that didn’t surprise her at all. She’d had him naked in her bed once, though absolutely nothing had happened, but she did remember it. One simply didn’t forget the sight of Khyan Nykara in the dawn’s light, unless they fell and cracked their skull, but...

“That would be something... Mesmer and Semblance play together nicely, and those Runes would build off of each other, wouldn’t they?” She wasn’t entirely certain just what the Semblance quirk was, but perhaps she would find out at some point... but like as not, it worked out well for them. And she hoped it was something that they could continue. The Fae that had come with her on this little excursion deserved something good in his life, and so, too, did Khyan. But she could see why both were drawn to each other, and she felt that the two of them formed a smart match. And that was just physically. Emotionally... Æros seemed steadfast, grounded while at the same time able to entertain loftier thoughts, and that struck her as something that would benefit her friend. “If you have it, and it works out well and enhances things for you... then why not?” she offered. There were plenty who liked to use, well...all kinds of things to spice things up for themselves, and if arcana was the choice between two Masters... “I think he is very lucky to have you in his corner.” It was not the effusive praise he may have been used to from the masses who sought favour through endlessly obeisant flattery, but it was something decidedly honest from the girl. That hope remained in her Symphony, as strange as it was...

She’d rather thought that he’d had lychee, but she liked the fruit and she knew she was one of the few Vastii who ever had access to it. But that was certainly one of the fringe benefits of what she did. She knew the things that were edible, and she had access to something very expensive on the market. That wasn’t to say she partook regularly, but she had tried them, and while they were a nice treat, Hilana was a sucker for the native fruits that she had grown up on harvesting in the wild. Wild berries, prickly pear, plums, peaches, even some apples that were remarkably drought-tolerant, though they were also babied along by those who sought to grow them. And the blackberries that they were enjoying now... she had a feeling they were going to be very popular indeed. “A trader from across the sea brought back a couple of samples of the bush about a year ago,” Hilana told him. “So Vasilei has been growing them in here since then, so we could establish them and get them ready to spread and cultivate. I think they’ll actually do quite well outside, too, they just need to be properly tended to. They seem to really like the light and heat, we’ve tried a sample outside in the garden up on the roof of the shop, and it’s doing pretty well. They are pretty similar to raspberries, aren’t they? They’re both bramble plants,” and looking at the plant that the fruits had come off of, that was easy to tell. “But they’re actually two very different berries. You’ll notice that these ones have their core, and they’re juicy and edible, but the raspberries actually separate from the stems when they’re harvested, that’s why they’re hollow. Blackberries have a lot more juice to them, which makes them interesting to cook with, but I’ve had good success so far. I’ve made some dessert breads with them and I’ve tried them in scones, and they actually turned out really well. They got streaked with purple, so they looked very marbled,” she was grinning again. “I’m hoping to try them in a pie next,” she admitted.

At the confirmation that it was in fact Khyan that the horned Fae was so taken with, Hilana’s energy started bursting with excitement, making her Symphony go somewhat haywire with that which had thus far been carefully restrained. It wasn’t aether or any such thing, just... far too much normal energy. That the girl had gotten used to those activities on the daily, that she could dart and run around the shop the way she had... The girl had spoken of something she’d called Wildness earlier, and...that now made an awful lot of sense. Her eyes brightened and she grinned broadly before she dialed it all back in, making the grin into a more appropriate smile. But she bowed to him. “Thank you, Dominus.” She knew that she owed him an explanation, though. “I’ve met him before, yes. I consider him to be a friend of mine, and I've worried about his situation with Consul Argenti," Hilana admitted. "That you care for him and will hopefully be able to buy him from them... I feel a lot better about it." That explained the odd notes in her Symphony. Hope, and now relief. It may not have been a done deal yet, but with luck..

[Aeros]

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Regarding Hilana’s sisters, her response was deduced from the emotions that played out within the song of her heart. Nonetheless, if he really wanted to discuss such a thing he had to have made her say it. Otherwise, how exactly would he have known? Sometimes people did get a bit touchy at the notion that somebody was listening in the way Æros was, and while the man was genuinely incapable of understanding why outside of hostile company and some niche scenarios, he was fully aware of that fact. Generally, the more one understands how another is feeling, the easier it is to put those emotions into words in a coherent manner. In his experience, his eavesdropping almost always dispersed communication issues and helped bridge misunderstandings as opposed to harming anything.

That being the case, when one only heard the emotions but had no context, sometimes it is a bit difficult to puzzle out why exactly somebody feels a certain way. In scenarios where that’s true, it requires a bit of guesswork and subtle questioning to try and get the other person to speak of the source themselves. Confrontation in this regard is usually the worst option as it makes people rather defensive, unfortunately. And while he considered that response to be irrational and unhelpful, he knew it was a common one and thus something he had to consider.

Further, with what information he had, it simply did not make a lick of sense as to why Hilana was so very, very against the idea of acquiring a Cardinal rune herself. To him, he couldn’t look at the marks in any other way than empowering. Yet to her, she saw them as shackles. As chains to subjugate her to her father. But why was that? Magic to him was freedom, it was prestige, it was an expression of the self and one’s will made manifest. To her, it was the exact opposite. The game, now, would be to shift her perspective.

And the first thing he would try is the offer of simply handing her a rune, no strings attached, no downside on her end, no payment expected, no nothing. A gift, completely free. Of course, given the power disparity between the two of them, it was predictable that she would decline this as such a gift would feel as if it would indebt her to him whether that was the case or not. As such, he was not ill prepared for this reaction on her end.

“Oh, he and I have reconnected recently and I doubt he’d mind. If anything he’d probably bug me for a rune of mine down the line and I’ve no complaint regarding that. He’s of strong stock, I imagine he’d be fine to handle another so it is of little inherent risk. And for you, you would have us both present to assist ought anything go awry.” It really wasn’t a problem on the other man’s end; frankly, he’d be happy to teach somebody if for no other reason than the fact that he simply adored the rune that he bore. It was his only one and he had it mastered, forging ahead to refine his skills ever still. Æros doubted he’d decline taking a student with as much enthusiasm as Hilana.

“Oh, the royals would be quite vexed if anyone not of the direct bloodline surpassed them in any way– especially a young thing like myself,” the elf laughed aloud. “Of course, I mean no slight to them at all in saying that. I do think that dilution has less of an impact on things than they believe, at least a bit. For as resplendent as the majesty that our Founders possess is, it simply doesn’t make sense to me that one would need ought more than a drop to be on quite powerful footing. The rest? Up to the individual…” And of this, he truly believed. Any amount of the Twins’ blood was a blessing and in some cases, diluting it had odd, curious effects that could rival that of purer stock. So to him, all one needed was that one little blessing, no matter how many times split.

Regarding those with arrogance enough to speak over specialists, he clicked his tongue in a way that indicated little more than disgust. “Oh, I’m well aware of those who believe themselves superior by default despite massive amounts of arrogance or ignorance that might blind them. There are…people innumerable like that.” He sighed, for as obnoxious as it was, these people had to be worked around rather than cast aside.

And when he spoke of movement, the response Hilana gave in that regard went from as expected to a bit surprising. He saw it coming that she preferred more active hobbies, yes, but he didn't think that it was this very nature that would be the cause of the initial divide between her and her father. Opposites by nature, the older man saw her as a possession to be controlled, not a person to raise…and she, stubborn, would never submit. Another piece clicked into place.

Her explanation almost made him wince, though that was because of certain parallels to his own upbringing. “My dear mother tried to use Mesmer on me, too, but possessing the rune made it weaker against me almost by default and then once the spells stopped being cast, I’d unravel the changes on myself. Within a decade and a half she and I were equals, cutting her ability to even try. It’s bitter victory, though, to use her own weapon against her– I carry a piece of that woman with me everywhere I go.” And while there was nothing he could do to undo that, he took solace in the fact that he had full control over his own æther. “That being the case, what I do with magic is mine and mine alone.” So while he might have also walked the bath of shunning his mother’s magic should it not have been forced upon him in his youth, it was now something he used purely for his own ends.

“I am, however, glad you have your aunt. I quite understand your disdain for Tertium at this point,” he said with a wry sort of chuckle.

At the mention of the stoneborn, Æros recalled his own meeting with the man as he had been considering making a purchase of sorts, though he did not end up going through with it. “I do think it’s a shame that Emblems cannot function without faith. How nice it would be to thieve the powers of other divines for our own ends, for Solunarium’s ends– alas,” he spoke with a sort of faux drama to his voice.

Regarding Crystallize, he was glad he said something given the fact that she had no idea about it. “Any Elementalist can use Crystallize– it’s a universal skill. You can infuse the essence of water, wind or fire into them just as well as you can do earth. And if I were to get Elementalism, for example, I could also infuse my Mesmer spells into the crystals. One could then infuse such a thing into alchemy and your potions could affect one’s mood…just like that. Isn’t it neat what a creative mind can do with the ability to weave æther?” He spoke of the spell’s applications with a bright sort of enthusiasm, genuinely quite fascinated with the arcane and its infinite possibilities.

When the subject shifted back to his own controlling parent, bitterness returned to his voice, his expression becoming a lot more restrained than he otherwise was. “Correct– bearing the pressure proved far too much for me. I was not able to be productive within her control, so I left.” Æros laughed, though it was in harsh mockery of himself. “...not that I’m productive at all of late.”

He was happy to speak of his lover, really, much as it was strange to discuss emotions in this way. Rather, it was strange to him that he felt emotions like this at all. Verbalizing them felt almost alien in many ways, and yet at the same time, it was so very cathartic so be able to express these things to another, to share his happiness like this.

To her question, “...yes, quite. It builds a sort of, ah…” he trailed off, looking for the right word. “...echo chamber, yes, that’s apt, between us. It builds and builds the longer we’re together into an ætheric crescendo that has been near to blinding at times,” he laughed at the notion but he really wasn’t kidding. They’d overstepped doing this. Multiple times. Did that stop them at all, however? No.

“Last time we were together, I did ask if he’d consider granting me his rune and despite his hesitance, I got him to agree on the conference. The day we agreed upon was the third of Earth’s Rest, I think? I’m not all too concerned…given my blood and how I’ve fared in the other two, I’m sure I’ll be fine.” He spoke of this agreement with little thought regarding the risk, as if he didn’t even understand why Khyan was so very concerned about giving it to him.

And at the notion that anyone, ever, was lucky to have him in their life: he laughed, waning into something distinctly bitter, a result of his own self loathing. “Oh, woe is to anyone who gets attached to me– I think I’m cruel for not cutting him off, frankly, but now that I’m in far too deep…I can’t walk away.” Of this, he was sincere. He firmly believed himself to be a curse and little more, but he was a selfish thing and Khyan brought him too much joy to leave behind.

The attention he gave the girl when she spoke of the fruit and its journey from the north and into Vasilei’s hands was quite rapt, actually. It fascinated him to learn how things like this moved through the world. A plant from one land moved by the hands of man to another and soon, the deserts would be blessed with such a lovely little delicacy. How so very nice, that.

“If you ever do make that pie, do let me know. It gives me an odd amount of joy to hear the way things move around like that, that people dedicate their lives to the spread and cultivation of nature’s bounty…” he trailed off, wanting to express this point but having little beyond that to add.

Æros blinked, a bit surprised at the vibrancy of sound that rolled through his form when he’d spoken his partner’s name. This was a markedly abnormal expression of feeling….for anyone. For any reason. Then there was the fact that she thanked him. His head canted and he looked confused, a half smile on his face as brows furrowed and his nose wrinkled.

“Thanking me? For what? A rash decision I’ve made because I can’t bear the thought of being apart from him for too long?” Upon saying this out loud, his eyes narrowed a bit as he realized she must’ve meant relative to the fact that he was ‘freeing’ the boy by buying him away from house Argenti. Æros shook his head. “Mmm…he can thank himself for that, really. Too good of a lover, he is; I simply can’t say no to him,” the elf shrugged. His insincerity was a jest; he cared far beyond the confines of sex but the point did still stand.

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'Thoughts'

"Vallenor Tongue/Speech"

"Vastien Tongue/Speech"

"Valasren Tongue/Speech"

"Common Tongue/Speech"

[Hilana Chenzira]

Her relationship with her sisters was complicated, but as dead as it was with her father. They had done their part in ‘civilizing’ her with much amusement and self-righteousness. They had a reputation to protect, after all. But if one asked Hilana, there was some part of it, especially from her eldest sister, where payback was part of it. It was subtle, but there were enough comments and looks for her to understand it. They may have considered her stupid and foolhardy, dull and ignorant for sure because she had little to say after a while. Not very social, nor learned in the graces that were expected of their Caste. And Hilana had bit her tongue and said nothing. Keep her eyes open and pay attention, and learn the bitter lessons. Wear the mask, play the role. And know, as Eliana had said, they’d die in days in the Sands. Let them be smug in their city and content with their lives. But always remember that there was more to the world than being some merchant’s broodmare. Her way of life was just as valid as theirs. Even if they didn’t think so.

To be fair, it wasn’t entirely one-sided. The youngest of the four sisters had earned part of that ire and rightfully - the theft of their mother’s veil was something that none of them would forgive her for, and it was also something Hilana would not apologize for. Their embarrassment at the youngest girl’s behaviour and chosen gifts for parties when she was pulled in for appearances until all pretenses of it were abandoned altogether. But she would never forget the fact that they had blamed her for the loss of their mother, even if she was old enough to see now that nearly all of that blame could be laid on her Aunt Sarala. It was another thing that had been brought up since she had come back to Tertium, and her elder sisters still hadn’t let it go. All of them older than she was, and issues that none of them wanted resolved. Hilana could play the part, had played the part, and put up with their hazing because she had no choice but to keep it buried and learn what she needed to do until she could escape into the sands. They were better off in their own lives, and she in hers. And if they never intersected, that was their preference.

When Æros assured her it would be no trouble, Hilana knew she was running short of excuses. Theoretically, her lack of aptitude testing shouldn’t matter. Both of her parents had Runes. All of her grandparents did. Her sisters did. And multiple family members had the Rune in question. Her chances of not being able to manage a Rune initiation, especially with multiple Masters on hand and her own knowledge of botany and medicine to have on hand to deal with symptoms and possible issues with threshold sickness. “I never had the aptitude testing,” she admitted to him, then. “My father made arrangements for it probably four or five times, and I usually got a warning from those who were sent to bring me in. I avoided it until he gave up with it. My friends that had it done…if they showed strength in an area… they usually didn’t come back out.” She knew that it likely sounded ridiculous, especially to someone who had an ambitious list of Runes he intended to master, but she knew she may as well explain herself here in the privacy of the greenhouse. “Now that I’m already in a city… that doesn’t matter much, does it?” She had a small smile on her face. “But he expects me to get a Rune to make it easier on him to sell me as an attractive marriage deal to some son of a Tertian merchant.”

And there it was. She hadn’t admitted it to anyone here before, not even Khyan though she had come close when she had seen him last. But now… the truth was out. She hardly looked old enough for such consideration, what with the way she dressed and used what cosmetics she did, what with those big eyes of hers. Not to mention her relentlessly cheerful way of carrying on, but this was a potentially clever act on her part. It was easy to dismiss a teenager. “He already tried once. I just got lucky and it fell apart before it was officially announced, and that’s how I ended up here in the capital. Out of sight, out of mind… so that any visible, possible link between our family and theirs, gone.” And with that revelation, it helped fit all of those pieces together. Hilana didn’t want to be dangled as bait, stuck in Tertium with some arrogant Equestrian that her father picked, permanently under his thumb and trapped. And by avoiding Runes, it made it far more difficult for her father to arrange it. “I know that it is expected, that my caste and yours have our fates chosen by our parents in this regard…” she shook her head. No. Not in Tertium.

And yet, it was cutting off her nose to spite her face. Either she didn’t see that or she had decided that it was acceptable to spite her father and buy herself some time for the next step. Or perhaps this Cold War with her father meant she couldn’t see it. But she had been attentive to the possibilities, and pleasantly surprised to learn such things about this particular Craft. Her Symphony didn’t show any aversion to marriage itself. It was more to the point of being trapped with someone that her father intended for her.

“You’re not wrong about that,” the girl admitted. She knew better than to directly criticize the Royals. Coming out of her mouth, that was something that could get her thrown into the Mount, or swallowed whole by one of the dragons. “But if someone is vexed by your abilities, then perhaps they should work on themselves and improve their own,” she had a small smile on her face. “I have faith in you. You are determined, you have the intellect, you have the creativity, and you have the will to master them. I think if you set your mind to it, you will achieve those goals.”

But as he spoke about his mother and his battles with her over Mesmer… Hilana was reminded that there were worse situations than her own with her father. And this was one of them. Being brainwashed into compliance was abhorrent to her, and not high on her to do list. Ever. But at least the Dominus had managed to unwork it and best her at her own game. “You carry a piece of her. But she does not define you,” she reminded him gently, her eyes searching his face. “You are your own person, Dominus. And she cannot take that from you. She is just one little part. Not even a fingernail. The rest is you. All of you. It’s not her weapon, it is a weapon. You simply use it, too. But how you use… that is up to you.” She smiled.

“My great aunt is something,” Hilana could chuckle about that, though. “She helped keep me sane when I wanted to dash my head into the walls, when they were all doing their best to do my head in. She bought me a year here, at least. Until Searing, she thinks. But we’ll see how long I can put him off, or if I just need to disappear into the Sands. But that means leaving behind everyone… and I can’t do that, either.” Her friends simply meant far too much to her. They were family in the best ways, all the ways that counted. They were pack, and to her, pack was everything.

“That is very useful, to be able to do such a thing. Happy dust for everyone,” Hilana was cheerful at the prospect. “Could one perhaps imbue someone else’s Emblem when Crystallize is used?” she asked after some consideration. “Or no, that wouldn’t work successfully?” She supposed not; but it didn’t hurt to ask. He knew far more on these subjects than she did - she had only just heard of Crystallizing, after all. But he was right, some of the other gods that she had heard about might have been useful to their homeland, but such as it was... citizens were forbidden such things. Such decrees weren’t hers to argue against, not with such a vaunted history as their Kingdom had.

“You discount yourself,” the girl told him. “You recognized that a situation was bad for you, and you removed yourself from it. A lot of people won’t do that, you know... Dominus, you are productive. You’re out and about, you’re reconnecting with people you lost touch with, you have found someone that you care deeply for and have forged something special with. You’re here. You’re awake. You’re alive. Healing from trauma isn’t always a straight line, and it is different for everyone. Just because some people thrive with nonstop activity doesn’t mean everyone that isn’t going from the time they get up until the time they close their eyes isn’t productive. Productivity is different for everyone.”

She nodded at the explanation. An echo chamber between two Masters, each possibly influencing each other’s emotions and feelings and sensations? She could well understand why that would produce such a toxicating effect. Hilana certainly enjoyed such activities, and she was mundane enough; so combining that? They were probably seeing stars the entire time, and not necessarily just the one that danced on the Fae’s skin.

“If it might reassure the two of you, I could stop by and check in on you to make sure all is well?” Hilana offered. “If you’re having issues with threshold sickness, then that is something that I can at least help with. Well, treating the symptoms, anyway, but there are a number of concoctions that I can make and have on hand. I can consult with Vasilei about which ones are best for treating the threshold for Semblance initiation, and stay with you a while, if need be?” Hilana may not have been able to help from a magical perspective, but treating something... that was up her alley, and she was glad to offer it.

“I don’t think so, no. I think you are too hard on yourself. Sometimes we have to take that leap. You might fall... but you could fly, too. You’re good for him. I don’t doubt that... and he is good for you.” She took a gamble, then, and reached out with her free hand to find his and squeeze it reassuringly with her own smaller one. While she had handed him things since she had met him, food or balm or plants... this was the first time she had dared to actually touch him, and she was trying to shake him out of that mental cycle she thought he might be circling in.

“When I make that pie, I will make two. And bring one for you,” she smiled at him. “When I get to baking... I tend to make quite a few, certainly more than I can eat, or Vasilei and his family can eat... but I like sharing them and seeing how people enjoy them,” Hilana explained. Sure, sometimes she had some disasters, and those ones were the ones she would usually keep and eat for herself. One of her first batches of scones had been like stones, and she had had to crush them up and just use them as a topping elsewhere lest she or someone else break their teeth on them. And a batch before that, when she was with her old pack in the sands, had used rocks to break them and then used them as bait for fishing... but fortunately enough, such clunkers were fewer and further in between.

“I thank you for getting him out of that situation, with luck,” Hilana shook her head at his words. “He may have entreated you to do it... but you are the one with the power to act,” the Vastiana smiled a bit ruefully. “He told me that Cetus was protecting him from his father, but at the same time... having him out of it entirely seems like a better option.” Founders knew she had thought about trying, and just taking out a loan if her bid with Gens Argenti had been accepted... but this was far better. “And better for the two of you, too, since then you’ve got him around whenever you want him,” she grinned at him. "And then you can make him practice his Animism and be a magpie so he can work on his ability to fly."

[Aeros]

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It was not a surprise to Æros that Hilana would try to offer yet another excuse to not accept the offer. Under other circumstances, another person declining the offer of a Cardinal rune would be left alone since it was such a deeply personal choice. However, here, he could tell both from her words and from her Symphony that her aversion towards magic and her refusal to accept any runes had actually nothing to do with her personal feelings, rather, she was avoiding them out of a defensive sort of spite regarding her father.

That spite, however, Æros was not aware of until he had spun the conversation towards her getting a rune. While he was avoidant of mentioning the fact that he'd gleaned a lot of his information from the song of her heart, he had no issue against using that information to direct his own words. He figured that, eventually, she'd run out of excuses for saying no and get to the actual reason– which she did.

"I suppose that is…one strategy," he said, almost surprised at the fact that she was willing to limit herself for that reason.

However, from his perspective, he'd never really thought about such a thing since he'd been given a rune before he even really understood what the contract of marriage was. It perplexed him, in reality, that if her father intended to use his daughters in this manner, why would he have waited to give them runes until they were old enough to skitter away? To avoid it? Perhaps that had to do with the wishes of the girl's mother, although he couldn't really tell.

"I've never really thought about my runes relative to my…appeal as a marriage candidate, to be frank. Granted, such a thing for me is on hold at the moment because of my rather erratic behavior," the Fæ laughed, knowing that this was also something that bothered his family.

To even open up Æros to the possibility would, at the moment, allow for prying eyes into his and his family's business and that was not something they wanted at the moment. Such a thing would cause a lot of gossip for myriad reasons stemming both from his behavior on its own and onto those who housed and raised him. To have done such a poor job raising one with blood so valuable would look rather embarrassing, indeed.

"That being the case…I'm sure there are more, ah…creative ways to foil your father's plans that don't involve self sabotage to such a degree. Maybe you'll even run across a man you like that fits his standards eventually? Either way, I just feel like it's such a shame to deny yourself the freedom and expression provided by magic, and that's before one even thinks about practical uses." He paused, taking a moment to think about what he wanted to say next.

Regarding the merit of the pure blooded, "...and that is precisely the point. To place value on only those with blood purity inflates their egos to a degree that there are some who…are quite notably unimpressive. They are the ones who would feel most slighted by the skill of one deemed lesser, for it is them who assume that they are entitled to prowess by birthright. And while I do believe being descended from the Founders is a boon, I don't believe that purity matters more than personal skill and effort. Plus, if blood purity was all you needed, then why is there such a difference between the best and worst of the royalty?" Æros laughed, knowing that some of the ones just now entering adulthood were actually…quite middling despite all the resources on top of the bloodline. Some of them hadn't mastered anything at all.

"Your encouragement is most appreciated, however…I suppose I'll need it down the line if ever I do get involved in matters more serious." The funny part here is that he already has, though he is certainly masking this fact since such things were now, officially, matters of the Vigilia Argenti. As such, it would not really be appropriate to share with his friend, lest the price be high if anyone ever were to overhear.

Æros then went on to speak of himself and his own relationship with his rune relative to his mother. Her response was exactly what he always tried to tell himself, hard as it was to internalize such a thing. "And yet every time I try to remind myself of that, I find it equally difficult to believe. I suppose that's where we diverged with magic and the yoke of our parents then, no? I had a rune foisted upon me and ended up using it against her. You avoid one to lessen the chance of being controlled…and yet, just as I've found my freedom through my magic, I believe the same can be done with you, too." And he did– especially since he firmly believed there would be a path to continue to avoid arranged marriage that didn't involve continuing to avoid runes.

"Plus, you don't ever have to even tell him you possess a rune to further the delay, if that is your wish. How would he know unless somebody tells him? I wouldn't, my cousin wouldn't and if you only cast outside of the vision of those who'd wish you ill…the risk is fairly low, I think." Granted, Semblers would be able to see it, but they'd also need cause to tell her father in the first place and he was all the way in Tertium. Most in Luxium that would ever find out simply wouldn't possess a reason to share.

“And then there's the fact that I think you and my cousin, Palæmon, would get along well. He’s got a passion for the rune that mirrors your own for botany– If I were to guess, I think he’d be happy to both grant it to you and teach you to wield it. Of course, any reimbursement for his time and effort will be worked out between him and I; you needn’t worry about a thing.” He paused, if only for a moment, realizing something that might help to add. “I can understand your trepidation about accepting favors, too, but things like this are commonplace among those of my caste. Perhaps not the granting of runes to those much lower, but granting them to one another, to friends, to family and so on? Commonplace. So if I vouched for you, the disparity of your class would be glossed over and he’d regard you as any other friend of mine. And to that end, I have endless faith in you. Your dedication and skill as somebody with not a single spell to her name speaks volumes of your work ethic and ability to learn in general. Think about yourself. Think about how pleased you’d be to further your own ends with the power of your own æther woven into the elements…and then think about how proud your mother would be; daughters of the sands, walkers of the wild that you both are.” He deliberately made no mention of the man who’d raised her, only speaking of what interactions she would have with him and his family because that’s what this was. Gaining a rune was personal to her, facilitated by them. Her father was not in the equation, and he wanted her to understand that because this was her life, she did not have to live it weighed down by his impact, the trauma of his control.

“Of course…your destiny is your own and far be it from me to force anything upon you, but from my vantage point, the choice to shun magic is not actually your own, either. While I now understand why, I encourage you to take that control back into your own hands and to make choices like this for yourself and nobody else.” While he spoke, he wove encouragement and soft undercurrents of excitement into her to accompany his words. It would give them just that much more of an impact, hopefully smoothing over some of the prickly emotions that thinking of her father elicited.

When Æros commented on her aunt, he realized that she was effectively on a time limit, but even so, there did have to be ways to avoid such a fate. "Perhaps endear yourself to somebody more powerful than your father and then ask them to push him off? Easiest thing I could think of," the mixed-blood chuckled. He'd do it, but he needn't be her only option should she manage to enchant others of higher caste.

Regarding the spell of Crystallize, "I am…not entirely sure about the way spells granted through Emblems interact with such a thing. I've never met anyone with one, to be honest, so…not sure. That would be a fascinating thing to find out should I ever come across somebody with Elementalism and an Emblem, rare as such a thing would be." The chances of coming across somebody like that were exceedingly low, but, well, if Æros intended to live out his life rather than throw it away, his projected lifespan was a long one.

Hilana's response to his self deprecation was far kinder than he really expected. The half-elf didn't really see much intrinsic value to who he was as a person so it was an odd thing to hear that somebody else would regard him so highly at all. The fact that Khyan was near to obsessed with him in general never ceased to surprise him, and then to know another person had such a positive impression? Absolutely bizarre.

"That…all might be true. I just don't have faith in myself as I am. Maybe that will change with time, but I've no idea where to start in terms of rebuilding anything that's been broken." While Æros was, at this point, going to endeavor to improve himself and his circumstances, he very much did not think he'd succeed.

And when Hilana offered to stop by sometime in the morning after Khyan would inevitably have to leave his side, the Færie smiled at the sentiment. "That would certainly assuage his worry, I think. And I'd be a fool to decline help. Much as I may very well be fine alone, I'd rather suffer less rather than more. If I recall, I think he'll have to be gone before daybreak…so any time after that I'll be by myself."

While it did sound almost like a joke when Æros mentioned it being cruel to keep Khyan around, he did actually mean that sentiment. It was unpleasant to think about how unhappy the other would be should anything poor happen to him and Æros did not think himself stable enough to avoid situations most precarious.

"He…certainly is good for me. I just worry that if anything were to happen to me, where he'd end up. Since I lack faith in myself, it's…a rather active fear." Whether it be death by any source or a poor outcome from the politics he'd found himself entangled within, he wasn't sure, but there were endless mistakes he could make and he did not trust himself at all to avoid them.

On the subject of Hilana's tendency to bake far too many things for herself to consume, the Færie laughed. "That so? I'll take whatever your overflow is…I have a sweet tooth myself."

"He'll be out of it should Cetus agree to the sale; I'm fully capable of getting the money. I'll be contacting the man in the coming days so I might know by the next time we meet, even." This was true– the second he'd even suggested the idea of his interest to Khyan, the boy was immediately very excited by it, going out of his way to encourage and expedite the process in whatever manners he could think of.

"His current master isn't a poor one, but…he made a passing comment once about how he'd much rather be under my control and then the second I showed even a bit of interest, he absolutely wouldn't let it go. So while he might effectively be safe there, it's clear to me where he'd be happiest at the moment." Æros sounded both flattered and surprised by his own words, still finding the other boy's enthusiasm hard to believe.

"That's certainly true. It is such a pain to navigate around his current schedule and, were I to get busy in the future, it'd be even harder to see one another." He actually hadn't thought about this fact and, realizing it now, he was ever more happy to move forward with buying out his partner's contract. "I might do that, too– I've not seen him in the shape of an animal at all before, actually."

He knew Khyan had the rune, but he'd never transformed in his presence. The thought of a bird who didn't know how to fly was quite entertaining, too.

- - -

'Thoughts'

"Vallenor Tongue/Speech"

"Vastien Tongue/Speech"

"Valasren Tongue/Speech"

"Common Tongue/Speech"

[Hilana Chenzira]

He wasn’t wrong. The lateness with getting Hilana assessed and subsequently marked and taught was due to the fact that she chose to flee, and she did not live with her family. She lived with her chosen family, but not those she was related to by blood. And after what had happened with her mother’s veil, getting ahold of the girl for any length of time for such an assessment, much less containing her when she knew the escape routes to find her freedom short of using Mesmer or locking her into things and running the chance of a blowout fight… her sisters had all been assessed much earlier, and the rudiments and basics started in the formal school situation in which they had been enrolled upon setting in Tertium. But getting someone who would teach such things to the children who tended to the herds, that was a bit more challenging. Her father hadn’t been happy, but Hilana had done everything to avoid and squirm out of his grasp. It had delayed things, and by the time she had let them cage her in Tertium, the girl refused to accept a Rune. It didn’t take, much to his irritation and frustration, but horns would lock again as Hilana bided her time and considered an escape.

But when he laughed about his own prospects of marriage, Hilana grinned at him. “We understand each other there. My reputation in Tertium was one of a wild, unbiddable nomad who would just as soon vanish into the sands and never come out. Someone who defied when she should have listened to her elders, engaged in activities her father and others felt were far below what gentle women should do, and that was just the things they knew about. They knew a fraction of what I did and got up to out there. My pack…my chosen family,” she explained, “had my back, as I had theirs. My father would have been furious at my guardians if he knew about any of it, but at the same time… such learning was necessary for survival out there. Both sides of my family have been nomads ever since we were forced from the North into the Sands; we did not settle in Vastium when it was formed. His tribe suffered great losses when he was a boy, and scattered to the winds - half of the survivors went to Tertium to settle; the remaining half went to the other tribes and villages. When he met my mother, he had returned to his roots in the Sands. So it was subjects I’m sure he knew at some level I would learn, and work I would perform… but I feel he was likely in denial.” She picked a few more blackberries, placing them in his hands.

Realization dawned in her eyes at his suggestion. Find her own partner. Someone that she chose, that he would approve of himself… that was smart. But her father’s stubbornness was where hers came from. “I am not opposed to marriage itself. I’m just…opposed to being trapped with someone who only wants me to be a pregnant ornament. The last one, that was his expectation. That I would not practice herbalism, nor any of which I’ve grown up with, and would tend the house and commandeer servi to run everything, to bear and raise children,” she admitted. “My great-aunt made a similar suggestion to him before; that it would better for all involved for a more…matched… partner, I guess you could say. Making matches and connections at the Frost Festival would likely have been more beneficial to him and his businesses, if he could pair me within a tribe that he didn’t have connections with in order to increase his reach… that’s far more useful to him than some second or third son of a Tertian merchant, isn’t it?” She scoffed. “But no, that was unacceptable because then I would be in the Sands and thus out of his reach and control. We can’t have that, can we? But who knows… he’s wanted some connections in the capital for some time, which is where I want to be now… so perhaps that might work.” Hilana knew she was going on at length about personal topics that she shouldn’t bore the Dominus with. But at the same time… he felt safe to talk to. He was interested, kind, and encouraging. And that was rare.

She was fascinated that he knew so much about the royalty and their abilities. Even to the gossiping grandmothers she listened to in the market, such things were not repeated. It was far above the station of the Vastii to comment on such things, much less render criticisms on the Populus Ex-Re’ha, be they Royals or not, but Hilana listened with rapt interest. He wasn’t wrong. If they had all of the advantages of purity of pedigree, the best resources possible in terms of paedagogi, materials, and funds... Then what excuses could they possibly make? No, the Dominus was quite correct.

“I have faith in you,” Hilana told him. “You may not have much in yourself some days... but I believe in you. We are always our own worst critic, especially when we have parents that are perpetually disappointed with us and are determined to shape us as they are... or as they want. But we are not them. She isn’t you. My father isn’t me. Even if their voices keep echoing in the backs of our heads... we owe it to ourselves to push them out, don’t we?” she offered a smile to him as she looked up at the taller Elf.

The idea of finding freedom in magic... in defending herself from one of her greatest fears, was a strange one. Hilana hadn’t considered that she would be able to use Magic in such a way, but it made sense that once one got to the level where they could match those that would befuddle and force their minds to choose and rewrite themselves into something that might have been up to then anathema to their nature... but when he put it that way, she knew full well that he was right. While she knew that he did have eyes on her, if she kept it hidden in private places... she didn’t know if those eyes belonged to a Sembler or not. She wouldn’t have been surprised, unfortunately but it was a risk she would have to take. And if they were, and if her father found out... then perhaps that could be used as an reason in the argument as to why she needed to stay here. “My eldest sister’s husband is a Sembler,” she admitted. “He would notice the moment I returned if he was around. My Great-Aunt offered that one to me before, if only for the use of helping to treat patients or figure out the structure of concoctions... and everything else, really... but I committed myself to doing it the hard way. She said I could have used it to try to hide from them... but they were certainly already ahead of me in that regard. I wouldn’t have been able to avoid them until I had gained enough skill, so that was a non-starter.”

Her eyes searched his face as he gave her reassurances that his cousin would likely take her on as a student. He was not wrong in that regard, when Hilana committed herself, she went full-bore, head on into something. That was one of the benefits of having energy to spare; she had the drive and dedication to practice until she got something right. Most things she picked up fairly well, and surely he might be able to recommend a book or three that she might be able to purchase somewhere, what with the Academia there... plus she could make her own notes on the lessons that they had. It surprised her in a way that she was so open to considering this. She had been resolutely determined to avoid it until or unless she had to go into the Sands when her father forced her recall. That she was risking filling in the trench that had been set up as a defense to her father with the chance of gaining something that was much more promising. Freedom.

Whether he intended it to or not, his words made her Symphony sing. Receiving encouragement like that, and acknowledgment, especially from her betters... was a balming validation. Hilana had taught herself long ago that what anyone else thought of her was none of her business, that she couldn’t control what people thought or did, but she could control her own reactions to them... but when she found a friend, their opinions mattered to her. Shots from them went right to the heart without breaking the skin, but the reverse was true, too, as she smiled and her eyes danced. Instinct wanted to squash him in a hug, or at least try to; the Dominus certainly outsized her, but that didn’t matter. The connection to her and the mother she barely remembered... she had the stories that her mother’s family had told her years ago about her, memories shared and talked about around the fires or on camelback. They’d encouraged her to take up that Rune, too. That her mother had been a dancer who charmed the spirits around her and they came readily and often, even before those who may have held their Arch element...

Daughters of the Sands, Walkers of the Wild...

“If your cousin will agree... then I would be honoured to learn from him,” she told him. As stubborn as she was... he had made so many good points. If she pushed her father outside the situation, and thought about how she could benefit far more from having such a Rune... he was right. “I promise you that I will not embarrass you with my efforts, Dominus. You have my vow.”

“I may end up doing that, invoking some of my friends,” Hilana admitted. “I’ve made a few that could pull rank on him, and tell him that I am required where I am... But I need to try to get him to relent on my own first. My guardians have all told me that my whiskers are grown, and that means that I need to hunt on my own,” she smiled wryly. Apparently, this ‘pack’ was very much a theme to her growing up, for her to make such comparisons even now. But there was no shame in getting assistance from her friends; Hilana was not above it. The strength of the wolf was the pack.

Rebuilding what was broken... She considered this. “A regular schedule, to start,” she offered. “Routine. Good food that is nourishing and normal... not enchanted like some of them do here, where it’s twisted to be something so fancy and absurd that it’s lost sight of what it was. And when you get up in the morning, and this is important,” she stood on tiptoes to try to bring herself level with him, though she did fail, “look in the mirror, and say five things you like about yourself. Rebuilding what’s broken starts in here,” she lightly tapped her chest with her finger. Squeezing his hand was one thing, but tapping him was another. Hilana lowered herself back down to her normal height. “Being kind to yourself is powerful... and most don’t realize how much so. But beyond that... assess the state of what is broken, survey the lay of the land, and then start small. Even if it’s just putting one foot in front of the other. Even if it’s just reaching out, and starting relationships and friendships anew. And once you get started... it gets easier and easier.” Considering her time in Tertium, she might have had some ideas about picking up shattered pieces to start again. She had had to pick up her own, if only to rebuild the mask she had worn, over and over and over...

She nodded, having already put the date in her head, and now she had a time to go with it. “I will be there,” she assured him. Hilana could get his address, and she would assemble her supplies, and as a plus... she would know where she could find him, which meant she had another address with which to bring baked treats to. “With some baked goods, too, to help with your recovery.” And when she made that pie, it would certainly be coming his way. But what he said about what would happen to him should something happen to the Fae was a valid concern. Hilana had no such responsibilities beyond her animals; and she already had people that would take the different creatures should the worst ever happen to her. But a servus was something different entirely. “You have got this,” she told him gently, but firmly. “With your skills, your abilities, your smarts... you will manage. I have faith in you. And sometimes when you have something to protect... you find strength you didn’t know you had. That isn’t to say that that should be your only motivator... but I know for myself, it’s a powerful one.” Hilana was sweetness and light until her friends were threatened. And in the space of a blink, that could turn around completely. She didn’t look like she was much of a threat to anyone, especially as mundane as she was, but her knowledge of plants was a different thing entirely. If one combined that with alchemy...

She nodded as he spoke about Khyan, and her Symphony got brighter and louder. Such news thrilled her, clearly. That he could be safe away from Argenti clutches, and in the arms of someone that cared for him... Hilana was ecstatic. It would be a much better situation all around for the former Patrician, and having Khyan there, she thought, would certainly help Æros, too. “I think he can be stubborn when he has reason to be,” she smiled at his words. Wouldn’t let it go... “The heart knows what it wants. Sometimes the challenge is silencing the mind.” She was grinning, though, when he told her he hadn’t yet seen him take another shape. “I found him as a magpie,” she confessed. “He was drunk, and he transformed and tried to fly off of the roof of a taberna. He did make some good flaps,” she had to add just to be clear that her friend hadn’t dropped like a brick from the roof. “I found him falling and brought him home to baby him, and when I woke up the next morning... no more magpie,” she seemed amused by this. But it was a fondly-held memory, knowing now what she did.

[Aeros]

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When she spoke of her time in her sands with a family she had chosen for herself, the noble listened with a sort of calm curiosity on the outside. On the inside, however, he felt longing. Æros could certainly see the appeal of disappearing out into the sands. Of disappearing in general, but not dying. And now that he wanted to live again, he found himself struggling to want to live where he was. He adored Solunarium, truly. He knew little else. He knew not where he would go, because for him, the sands of Atraxia or the jungles of Ecith were both extremely unappealing.

Yet at the same time, her words still sang a tempting song. This society was…oppressive. For everyone below royalty, and even then, there was still a hierarchy within their ranks. Truly, it never ended. Parts of him longed for a life wherein one need not deal with such ties. A life where one had no gods, no masters. But in order to do that, he’d have to leave everything he’d ever known behind and likely never be welcomed back. Did he want that? Maybe. Could he handle that? Maybe. It wasn’t a decision he could make now nor was it one that he could actually act upon at the moment…but it was yet another idea that floated through the mind of the listless Fæ.

He chuckled, a sort of half-hearted smile flashed across his face for the briefest of moments while his eyes reflected nothing at all. At the offer of more fruit, “My thanks…these really are quite lovely, I think.”

Then, he shook his head as he thought about his response. “I can’t even blame you. If we were surrounded by a climate more hospitable to those of my blood, I’d’ve probably skittered off into the wilds, too. But for me? My father’s half makes it…” he clicked his tongue, ”...difficult…to spend much time in the desert.” Then his features lit up in a moment of brief realization, “...however, that’s not as big of a deal as it once was. A traveler I met in the middle of the month gave me a crystal, something he made with Elementalism’s Crystallize, actually, that actually helps me not overheat so long as I have it on my person. I still don’t know how much I’d enjoy the desert, though.” The elf laughed, a bit of a grimace on his face when he thought about living without the luxuries he’d grown painfully dependent upon. “It does feel like little more than a gilded cage here, at times.” He sighed.

“Nonetheless, I don’t think your heart suits what your father wants and the battle he’s fighting with you is one I’m sure he will lose, one way or another…though I can’t predict how much misfortune will be wrought ‘afore the battle ends.” Of this, he really was confident, but the thing about that was even if she did, it could still be a very messy endeavor.

And then when the subject shifted to marriage, Æros was a bit surprised that she hadn’t considered finding somebody within that capital. There were plenty of viable suitors here, plenty that would even far exceed what her father wanted for her in the first place. “All things considered, I don’t doubt there’s a good option somewhere either above or below. It’s just…a matter of finding the right person for you. And as far as I’m aware, there’s really no sure fire way to go searching for that.” He meant to be encouraging, really, but his experience with actual romantic endeavors was very little beyond sex and the one person he’d connected with was very, very recent and not found with any deliberation.

Regarding the royalty, some of them really were rather embarrassing regarding their prowess with whatever runes that they’d been granted. Very few people actually spoke of this fact because it was…exceptionally embarrassing for the royals themselves, and anyone below them that they caught speaking ill would be punished. So here, in a greenhouse in the company of somebody who’d dare not speak ill of him, he felt like he could speak freely on the subject.

Regarding his faith in himself? That was another matter entirely. His mastery of Mesmer was nothing to be scoffed at, but all his life he’d been led to believe it was nothing impressive, either. He’d barely tapped into the power held in Masquerade, a fact that vexed him greatly, and having only two Cardinal runes genuinely bothered him. So while what she had said was both kind and true, the words almost ran through him, not making a difference beyond endearing her to him.

“I…appreciate the sentiment. I suppose if I actually stop wasting away and bother to push Masquerade the way I did Mesmer, I’ll feel a little better,” the elven Færie sighed, “...the problem is how much time I’ve wasted at this point. The fact that I have no real direction. Everything feels…pointless, to be honest.” That was the truth of it, really. He felt like he was treading water and lacked the agency to do anything, and living meant that he'd be forced to do so until his limbs gave out.

“Such as it is with Semblance…it will allow one to hide, but you’re fighting an uphill battle with it. Here, for sure, at least. Semblance is so very common,” the man laughed, bitter as it was. “It’s why I really want it for myself, though. I feel I’d be at a significant disadvantage when dealing with somebody else who has it whilst I remain without. I’d suggest it for you, too, but which rune you go for, if any, is not my place to speak on.” To be frank, that’s a problem with a lot of runes here.

A Mesmer of low skill, for example, would barely be able to make use of it in his own caste given how common it was to have that or Negation. People of equal skill could reasonably resist each other, after all, and if somebody were better than you? Then you’re out of luck. Even he, a master, was blocked from making full use of it when interacting with anyone of high rank. Whether they had mastered it, another rune, or possessed enough wealth to buy an item that would shield them, it was not uncommon to be unable to use his skills. If at all possible, Æros hoped to one day find a way to pierce these barriers.

In his efforts to encourage his friend to open herself to the personal freedom magic genuinely provided, Æros smiled when he heard the crescendo of positive emotions that ran through her. How could he not? Not only was he happy at his own success, but he felt happy that she would finally be able to embrace herself, her own soul, her own æther and wield it for her own desires.

“Full glad am I that I’ve managed to reach you,” he smiled, his expression genuinely sweet. Thinking for a second, “...I’ll contact Palæmon soon. It’s, ah…been a minute since I’ve been in active communication with my family but most of them respond positively despite that.” He actually sounded somewhat sheepish about this. It was always embarrassing to go and seek them out on his own after leaving very deliberately but for those who did care, they never responded in any way other than with open arms. “And I have full faith in you.”

“Much as I want to pretend it’s not the case, there is a significant amount of strength to be found in numbers. Surround yourself with people that rival your father and then…what can he really do?” Æros shrugged, a bit dramatic, as if mocking her father’s powerlessness in that scenario. “I’ve been alone long enough to learn that, at least,” and though he did laugh, it was, once again, bitter.

For most of his life, his extended family avoided interfering with the way his mother was raising him out of a sort of respect for her, due to the fact that he was hers. Unknown to Æros, however, some of them have grown tired of the way that she’s squandered his potential with her fist of iron and that soon, they’d step over that boundary and offer assistance of their own. While the harm of the past cannot be undone, something new can always be built on the ruins thereof.

The Færie tilted his head as she spoke of how to begin the process of self improvement, a wry sort of smirk on his face. He knew damn well he had never really bothered with…any of that, really. Especially not in the past couple years. Frankly, he barely ate at all, and while being Fæ-ethalan allowed him to get away with this to some extent, he nevertheless managed to push his limits even then. Still, he would ignore the strain of not taking care of himself with opium, usually. While this worked, to pretend that such a thing was at all healthy would be outright delusional. Especially when one considered the fact that to maintain that feeling of being ‘okay’ he had to be nearly perpetually high.

It was charming that she had the confidence to touch him at all, all things considered. Most people usually gave him more than a foot of space lest they offend. And while for many this was appreciated, it was sometimes rather isolating, in truth. So for both times she bridged the space between them, he did little to resist.

“I suppose I’ll be starting from zero, but…what you say is true. Even land razed to the ground by fire can become lush once more when there is enough time passed. Some cases, faster, even with intervention but…I really never expect people to help.” Because when did he have help? Never. His mother didn’t offer her assistance and she actively discouraged others from doing so because, well, if he were to accomplish anything with the assistance of others, was it truly his accomplishment at all? She, of course, would say no.

“...honestly, any sort of relationship beyond acquaintance or a sort of peaceful hostility is, ah…foreign to me, to be frank. It’s why everything with Khy is making my head spin, in all honesty. In some ways, it feels almost too fast but…I have no desire to slow down, either.” Though he had many worries about the future regarding his involvement with his partner, he wouldn’t make the choices he had if he didn’t want to.

And much as the attitude of accomplishing everything on one’s own being the only ‘true’ way was burned into him by his mother, it really would be so very nice to have his lover always around, at least one person he could consistently rely on. Then, the friendship he was forging here was another person he could rely on. And while he felt some shame at the idea of doing so, the benefits thereof would be…stupid, frankly, to deny.

The elf smiled, a bit surprised but mostly flattered. “If it’s inconvenient, you really don’t have to help. Honestly, Khyan might get a little bit jealous at the thought…but I suppose he can deal with that,” Æros chuckled. “I’d never deny baked goods, though, so I do look forward to that.” The thought that anyone wanted to go out of their way for him to no benefit of their own was heartwarming, really.

“Perhaps, but there’s always an air of mystery when it comes to gaining a rune. Sometimes even the strongest prospects still fall for one reason or another. Some will say that the Founders themselves decided to pluck them from life for their own uses in cases like that, but for all anyone knows there’s just always an omnipresent chance of failure. Granted…it’s not as if I’ll lean into letting go at this point.” Despite the macabre nature of that which he spoke, there were colorful threads of curiosity about the subject woven throughout. He did wonder about all the little pieces that came together to determine the outcome of any given initiation as it was not something anyone had ever been able to figure out despite how many had been performed over the years.

The joy Hilana felt about Khyan’s potential freedom really was sweet. To care so much about his fate really did speak to her abundance of both kindness and empathy. “Stubborn, insistent, needy…? He is all of that and more. He tries to hide it, to be honest, but he’s really rather poor about that. And that isn’t even because I can use Mesmer to read him– he’s genuinely just terrible at hiding his emotions,” Æros laughed. “...and excitable in general and when he gets like that, he’s ever the more difficult to deny.”

The story of Khyan as a magpie made him laugh more. In thinking about it, would an Animist have any idea how to fly just because they had taken the shape of a bird? They wouldn’t, wouldn’t they? He’d never really given the idea much thought before, but it did make sense. Birds learnt the skill young and used it constantly. A person taking that shape would, well…be clumsy to say the very least.

“Is that so? I’ve never seen him fully take either of his shapes. I do know about the one as he’d mentioned it once. I do wonder how sad it looks to see a bird fail to fly so spectacularly,” he chuckled. He imagined the animal would look sick or injured.

“He also showed me his retractable fangs granted to him when he’d gained the rune. They’re fascinating, I think, though I was worried a bit at first about his level of control regarding those. The Atraxian asp is…really rather venomous and taking my chances with that? Questionable.” Luckily, the other had thus far not made any missteps in that regard.

- - -

'Thoughts'

"Vallenor Tongue/Speech"

"Vastien Tongue/Speech"

"Valasren Tongue/Speech"

"Common Tongue/Speech"

[Hilana Chenzira]

For all the wildness that the nomads had, there was still a structure there. But it was a different structure than what one found in the cities; in the Expanse birth mattered less and ability and skill mattered much more. It was one of the things Hilana loved about it; almost all were on equal footing out there amongst the tribes. Of course, they still bowed to the Re’ha that would join them, as was natural and proper, but few elves bothered that far out in such a harsh life. Soldiers and guards, perhaps when they encountered them, but that was few and far between. Beyond that? There were the chiefs, the elders, and everyone had their tasks. It was for the group as a whole, not for the individual. They were threads that wove the tapestry that was their tribe. Her own packs had operated much the same way, but in the cities... Well, it was knowing who and what to avoid, and just trying to keep unnecessary attention off of herself. Stepping on the wrong toes was a risky venture indeed, and Hilana was determined to avoid it.

Hilana’s smile was bright as he took the blackberries, and with those in hand, she led him further into the greenhouse, over towards another set of bushes in pots. These ones were her favourite, not necessarily for eating, but for the fact that she liked to make an oil out of them and combine it with lilac for her own personal choice of scent, if she needed to be somewhere where such perfumes were appropriate. There were thick clusters of white, almost crystalline looking berries on them, and she took a few from a branch and offered them to the half-Fae as well. “These are called gooseberries, Dominus They don’t survive beyond the greenhouse; they need a hard winter for a while. So we move them to the cooling room when it’s time.” These were almost never seen on the market; most of what they produced in the greenhouses was used in the shop or for personal use in the case of Hilana’s favourite little pet project. They tasted slightly sharper than a grape; still sweet, but with their own acidic tang to them.

As he mentioned his father, her head tilted in wonder. She really had no idea just what sort of parents he had; and if that somehow related to why he only had four fingers and horns. Maybe some races were just like that, but perhaps she had a chance to find out. “The desert does cool down considerably at night, at least, it drops by as much as half once the sun goes down, especially in Frost. Your father comes from a land where it is much colder, then?” Hilana was curious, which was another permanently-present note in her Symphony, and it was starting to become rather dominant now that her curiosity was certainly piqued by the prospects of finding out the answer to this puzzle, and perhaps learning even more about lands beyond their own. Using a crystal to help keep people cool... now, that was a fascinating idea. Finn and perhaps Raithen could use one, once she learned how to make such a thing. “And...forgive me if this is too bold... but is that why you only have four fingers?” The girl seemed a bit hesitant to ask it, but considering he had tolerated her well thus far, well... with luck, she wasn’t going to insult him with that query.

“Founders will it, with no casualties and he backs down, before it comes to a more than an argument,” Hilana smiled wryly, though her eyes were bright. “Inasmuch as we do not get along, I am content to leave them alone if I am left alone by them in turn. It worked out well for a number of years, although he could move me from place to place in the different groups and I didn’t have say in it. But the head wolves did. The group leaders,” she added. “My father’s businesses work a lot with other nomadic tribes, delivering and receiving goods from them and reselling things beyond the seas, along with raising various herds. So you would think he would have been satisfied with my participating that way since he doesn’t have any sons and my sisters have never had the inclination to go out and do what needs doing... but the sands and anything beyond the home are not things he wants his daughters into anyway,” she crossed her eyes and made a brief face. She definitely did not look like someone who was of age to be married when she did that, but it was at least funny. She helped herself to a gooseberry. “I’d say you’re right about that,” Hilana admitted. “I just never considered that possibility... But it’s likely a more viable way to go. Beat him to it, right?” The Vastiana had never lacked for attention or companionship; she was a cheerful, friendly girl and she knew she could clean up well if she was of a mind to do it; she’d had to for the last couple of years in Tertium. Being trotted out everywhere but where she wanted to go.

“What matters isn’t the time you’ve spent wasted, as you say, but what you do going forward,” Hilana was gentle. “You can make up for it, I have no doubt about that, if you commit to it. Be it one breath at a time, one step at a time, one day at a time... commit to it. Because look at this,” she indicated his outfit with both hands, to the resplendent, constantly changing fabric. “This is stunning, and you’ve been maintaining it all this time. That is something, you know. Despite all of the distractions and the change in the environment, the food, berries, listening to me and making sense of my weirdness, and finding solutions that I hadn’t thought of... you’ve been doing it. If you keep doing it... you keep pushing... you will make up for that time. You have so much time ahead of you, and now you’ve got reasons to keep going. Nothing is pointless. There’s always something... sometimes, it’s just harder to see. The difference between ordeal and adventure is how you look at it. One way or another, it is going to happen. You can hate it, turn away from it, shun it, not want to continue... and it becomes your ordeal. Or you lift your head, square your shoulders, and face it. Tell it, ‘I dare you’. And it becomes your adventure.” As outlandish as that sounded, she did truly believe in it. Venture belonged to the adventurous.

“Being a Mesmer would give you a step up from Semblers, surely? Can you change your own Symphony to hide things from them?” Hilana tilted her head with curiosity. She wasn’t sure if that would work, but maybe it was something to consider. As much as she had eschewed the way her father had wanted her raised, and she had loved her childhood and growing up for the most part, there were undeniable consequences to the fact some of her education was very much left wanting. Out in the sands, Hilana was fine. She knew where she was going, she knew what she could and couldn’t eat, she knew the creatures, she knew the ways of her people. But inside the cities, where other things took far more precedence than survival and navigation, she was at considerable disadvantage despite the rush of catching-up she had had to do in Tertium lest she open her mouth and insert her foot.

“There is no rush, Dominus. Whenever your schedules work out, I will make mine work,” she assured him. Vasilei was mostly forgiving in that regard; hours would always be made up somewhere. “And assuming I don’t burn down the city in a catastrophic way through Elementalism, then perhaps Semblance will be next,” she tried to take the bitterness out of his laugh by giving him something a bit funnier to consider. “And you could teach me that one, assuming I do not scare off both you and your cousin with my first Rune.”

“There are trees and plants that need fire, you know, as funny as that may sound,” Hilana told him. “Fire and heat are needed to open seed pods and such to allow the plant to germinate. The fire can help restore the soil or make it worse, depending... but fire cleans. And the trial by fire might burn, but the scars are neat reminders,” she squeezed his hand again before letting go, indicating a couple of scars on her forearms. While faded, they were disuniform enough to suggest that that was where they had come from. Fire.

“There’s no shame in accepting help, is there?” she pointed out with a small smile. He’d helped her, even if she hadn’t been of the mind to see it at first. “The strength of the Pack is the Wolf, and the strength of the Wolf is the Pack. There’s no shame in accepting help, or needing it. None of us live alone. Even plants don’t, you know. We’re all a part of this world, as much as the trees and the stars,” Hilana grinned; she hadn’t meant to invoke the celestial sky when one in front of her was emblazoned with them, but it fit. “But if you open yourself up to the possibilities... and I know it’s hard because in your position, it’s much harder to know who is genuine and who isn’t... but you have magic to help with that. But don’t distress yourself with dark imaginings. That doesn’t help you at all. Give them and yourself a chance. Tell yourself five good things every day when you wake up, and decide it is going to be your adventure. No more ordeals. Adventure.”

She could imagine Khyan might not be too happy about her visiting the private domus of his lover and his intended, but hopefully, when he knew it was her, he wouldn’t be as bothered. She did care for her friend and his feelings, and she did not want him to be too put out by it. “If Khyan has problems with my coming by to assist you, then he will just have to build a bridge and get over it,” Hilana’s eyes danced, and her tone was full-on humour. Her friend, however, had no reason to be concerned. The girl may have enjoyed her fun; but it wasn’t had at the expense of relationships of others, much less the ones of those that she cared about. “I joke, but truly, he need never worry about that from me. I don’t interfere in the relationships of my friends. And even if I did, I don’t think you’ve eyes for anyone but him,” Hilana chuckled. “I’m just there to ensure any symptoms you have from threshold sickness are well-managed and you are as comfortable as possible, and to bring clarity however I can.”

“It’s refreshing, all things considered, that he trusts you so much to open up to you like that. It’s a good thing when you can be honest with each other. I think that’s what strong relationships are built on: intimacy at its finest. Being able to share and do so honestly, accepting their flow and energy and they accept yours,” she smiled at him. “I was terrified when I saw him falling,” Hilana admitted, remembering how she had ran in the sandy streets of the bazaar to try to catch him, ultimately failing to do so. “It was a fair distance down, but their bones are hollow and they don’t weigh as much, and since he was drinking he hadn’t tensed himself when he hit the ground... so that helps reduce damage, surprisingly. The more you tense up, the more the shock to the body on collision,” she explained. “Which in turn means more injuries sustained, really. But he was okay once he woke up, at least, well awake in my bed. I almost didn’t register him being there because I was looking for my magpie patient,” the girl laughed, shaking her head. “I have a cat that is terrified of birds, so I know she wouldn’t have bothered him, but still...”

“I think his control is impeccable, especially with those he's fond of. But if the possibility of an accident does bother you, you can send him up to me and I’ll get his venom from him and turn it into antivenin for you,” Hilana offered. She did at least have something up her non-existent sleeves for him in that regard. “I did offer to buy that from him before, because we can always use it in the shop, but he’s yet to take me up on it. Maybe one day. But if it would make you feel better, then you’d have something as a failsafe on hand.”

[Aeros]

TIMESTAMP: -
NOTES: -

► Show Spoiler

- - -

- - -

Always having had a weakness for life's sweeter things, Æros was happy to accept further offerings of more berries. The next variety was one he didn't quite recognize; they almost looked like green grapes, but they were oddly translucent with another extraneous sort of stem at the bottom. He looked at them curiously as Hilana explained both the name of the strange fruit and additional information about them. Upon trying them, they were not unlike grapes, though they did have their own unique sort of tartness to them.

"Interesting…I suppose if some plants thrive in heat, others would have adapted to life in colder climates. I do wonder what their natural habitats look like," the Færie said this with a sort of curious fascination, letting his mind wander again towards the idea of traveling. He really ought to find an experienced Traversion mage that he could befriend and convince to allow him to tag along with them. Such mages were hard to find and pin down, though, given that most of them were natural wanderers.

The Færie's casual mentioning of his father sparked more curiosity in his friend than he really expected. On his own end, he knew very little, and of what he did know, he wasn't exactly secretive about. He had no reason to mind any questions about the subject, but the more specific they were, the less likely he could answer them. What did surprise him, however, was that her questions seemed to indicate an ignorance to Fæ-ethalan in general…but was that really all too strange for somebody who had spent most of their time in the sands? Encountering Fæ out there was probably even rarer than in the capital itself.

"I…believe so. I'm not entirely sure from where he hailed since, as far as I was told, he was a man who didn't call anywhere in particular 'home.' I was told that he spent a lot of his time in the northern parts of Karnor, however, where it can be quite cold…so I would imagine the answer to that is yes." His father actually was a well versed Traversion mage, now that he thought about it. In terms of runes, he was told the man had mastered that and Elementalism with some skill in Masquerade as well. The man's apparent popularity when he'd visited was resultant of both magical prowess and his own eldritch sort of beauty.

"As for the second question…yes, if I recall correctly, he and I do share that trait. Which you might think makes sense, but Fæ-ethalan genetics are…markedly strange. Sometimes, the children look nothing like the parents aside from traits and colors resembling their respective Court that all within it, even if not directly related whatsoever, share." He paused for a moment before he realized she likely has no context for what Fæ Courts even mean. "Um…there's four. One for each season. All Fæ-ethalan are united in the fact that we've been corrupted by magic of the Everwilds, but we do have our own societies within the whole, and you can usually hazard a guess just by looking at any given individual…or getting one to talk for about five minutes, if one was raised within a community of their respective Court, that is. Summer are markedly most friendly, most human. Fall are often introverted, strange groups of wanderers…Spring are wanderers, too, but they concern themselves the most with natural balance and…Winter?"

"We are usually…pretentious, austere, unsympathetic– we hold dominion over a cold sort of majesty, pride ourselves with arcane ability and the like. We are most similar to Solunarium's Starborn, so to speak, in that we are taught our blood is innately superior to the rest…but by 'the rest' I mean…everyone. That is one thing my mother told me of my father, that he claimed those of us born Winter Fæ are a step above all other mortal races. Funny, then, that I am also half Starborn elf, huh?" Æros laughed, something amused and self righteous at first, though it did ring bitter, almost wistful. Given how far his mental health had decayed, he struggled to believe his blood made him better than anyone or anything regardless of what tales had been spun to the contrary.

"I imagine my father would say that such a thing is only fitting for his progeny, as I was told he embodied the traits Winter Fæ are known for. But who knows? My mother never even knew she'd fallen pregnant until after he'd left, and thus far, he's never been back." It was an odd thing to think about. Would he have bothered to come back at all if he knew he had sired a child? Maybe, maybe not. Æros liked to imagine that the man would, if for no reason other than the vaguest of curiosities. He was, at the very least, certain that he didn't inherit his natural curiosity from his mother.

When it came to the way Hilana's father handled his children, it really did remind Æros of his mother. She, too, thought that she knew what was best for all of them and would become quite obstinate if there was any resistance whatsoever. Luckily for his siblings, they all walked paths she approved of. Granted, she put far fewer expectations upon them as they were not anomalies like he was. Nevertheless, the similarities in their two still present parents were really quite uncanny.

"I imagine your father and my mother would either get along swimmingly or utterly despise one another," he said with mocking laughter. "...arrogant and self righteous as they both are." They would either see kinship in one another or his mother would look down her elven nose at the human and he, regardless of required outward decorum, probably wouldn't be fond of such blatant condescension.

"While I acknowledge finding a lover on a time limit might be harder than it sounds…it would be the very best solution. Stops the problem altogether; you'd no longer have to run from him. Everything else just serves to buy you more time, I think." He was curious about who it was she would find, if successful.

Æros was not usually one to bother voicing his concerns about himself or his internal struggles for he really did not see the benefit in doing so. Most were either indifferent, cold or were just not the best at providing any useful support, and so over time, he grew used to not sharing much about his current mental state at all. Here, however? It was actually cathartic to be able to tell his weaknesses to somebody who not only listened, but provided support that was actually helpful.

Æros had not actually thought about the fact that maintaining a Masquerade illusion was a feat of focus. Once one had come up with a design and wove it into an item, the complex thought was no longer necessary…but the focus on maintaining the æther to keep said design present still was, and with more complex designs, more æther was required and thus more focus. He had grown used to doing this, so internally, that mental process had become more or less an omnipresent afterthought. All the same, a break in his cast would cause the illusion itself to dissipate. He'd run into this problem when he was still a novice quite a few times, but such a thing had become notably easier to maintain with less thought.

"Ah…you're right. Figures I'd gloss over my own improvements any time they're present," he almost looked a bit embarrassed. "It used to be much harder to maintain, especially in scenarios with ample distractions."

"With magic especially, I suppose it is just…difficult for me to take pride in smaller achievements, what with being surrounded by masters in any given rune." Æros tilted his head, "...actually, I've not met a master of Affliction, but that's, ah…not the point. I usually just find myself comparing my fledgling abilities to those who are far more skilled." In the case of Masquerade, the person to which he most often compared himself was one for whom he held great admiration. As such, he held himself to her standard whilst disregarding the fact that even she would call him ridiculous for doing so.

"But your point does stand– I shouldn't ignore my progress, even if my steps forward are small. The other thing is that…I'm just not sure where I ought to put my focus. I can look inward for personal improvement and power, I…feel…the need to go out of my way to appease the Founders in the coming seasons and I really ought to do something to carve a name for myself in Solunarium politics one way or another." In the middle of speaking, Æros abruptly slowed down, almost as if he was unsure how to phrase what he meant, when he spoke of the Founders.

This was because Hilana was ignorant regarding his dealings with the divine and he genuinely did not want to speak about it for his interactions with both Arcas and Varvara were a source of deep embarrassment. There was also the fact that the Arcas branch of that tale was something he was prohibited to speak about in general.

Of course, he still thought that the way Phocion had opted to deal with the situation initially was stupid beyond belief, only to then be fixed by Arcas himself offering a slightly different path. This was much to Æros' personal annoyance because while Arcas did fix the deal to be more amenable in the way he had wanted, the divine said nothing in the Fæ's defense. As a result, he gained nothing from that entire encounter other than a loss of face with the Vigilia Argenti and it genuinely did make him wish he'd died out in the sands. It wasn't as if he was unaware of the rigidity of the way business was handled amongst royalty, no, but they certainly offered zero benefit of the doubt to somebody unexpectedly swept up in their tides. All of that aside, interacting with the stone titan of an entity known as 'Arcas' was…markedly painful. He had some depth to him that was deeply fascinating, yes, but the other never wanted to open himself up. So really, even if he could regale Hilana with this god-touched tale, he had no desire to do so because it was awful.

While on the other end, the Varvara branch he simply did not want to acknowledge verbally. That part was his fault entirely; he had acted out of emotion and frustration that had been wrought by the entirety of the previous arc of this story. Unable to have reined in and stabilized his emotions, he spoke out of turn to the one soul he absolutely should not have. And that little twist of fate would continue to haunt him for quite awhile, he imagined.

His mind, the day it happened, was initially impassioned– he wanted to be better, do better. Now, two days later? He felt the opposite. A bit of a grim omen, that, as he would very likely continue to go back and forth with this thought process as days went on. And if history were anything to go off of, the more pessimistic attitude had the best chance of winning.

As the conversation shifted more towards Cardinal runes and the exchange thereof, Æros smiled at her enthusiasm now that he'd managed to change the girl's mind– and with minimal use of magic, at that.

"When I get a better grasp of Semblance, I'll happily confer that one onto you. Might take a bit, though, because it's…incredibly dangerous for a mage below a certain skill threshold to grant it to another. But…I'll do my best to get there." He'd be disappointed in himself for a great mix of reasons should his advancement of the rune be slow.

"I do look forward to watching you grow into your Elementalism mark– I'm quite curious about which element you'll find resonates with you most." The four primary elements were typically what most people chose, though there were others a more determined mage could tune themselves with if they were particularly insistent.

And when her comments about fire came and went, he did wonder what experience she had with it in the literal sense given the marks she bore. He was a bit wary about asking after that at the moment, perhaps another time?

She then went on to speak about how little in life truly ever flourishes all by itself. "That's…true enough. Even the most arrogant of people are in power because of people below them. It'll likely be difficult for me to break away from the thought pattern that I need to do everything myself, but…I'll certainly try. If I am to keep on living, I might as well try to enjoy it by actually working to improve my circumstances and that starts within." Though he said this and meant it, he was still on the fence about whether the whole 'existing on this material plane' was something he even wanted. But from now on until he'd make the decision to die on his own, he would be stalwart in his efforts to make his life better.

Æros laughed when she spoke of Khyan and his potential jealousy, an appreciated levity to their previous subject matter. "Even if you were of the mind to meddle in the affairs of others, he'd really not have any place to be upset with anyone but me– it's not as if you could ever do anything with me without my approval in the first place." This was said because he really didn't want others to burden themselves with undue concern about his choices and affairs.

"That being said, he does hold a monopoly over my attention…and as such, he has nothing rational to worry about. If he does, I'm sure I'll be able to quell his concerns." Æros spoke with affection towards the other in his words, a soft smile remaining on his lips when he finished.

"He definitely wants to share with me…though I do still feel trepidation and embarrassment in his Symphony when he says things like that. He can't really help himself, however, too easily caught up in his emotions…but it's really rather cute when that happens," the Færie spoke with a soft bit of a laugh at the end.

He found the anatomy of bird bones to be interesting when Hilana spoke of them, but he was more just relieved to hear that Khyan's fascinating choices hadn't actually resulted in any serious or lasting injuries. "At least he's alright…but I suppose I'll keep in mind that I'll need to learn to fly should I ever acquire Animism and a form of something with wings." He was unsure if he ever would, but he'd rather be prepared than not.

"Perhaps I'll talk to him about bringing you some of that venom, then? Would be nice to have on hand should there be any sort of accident. I know I have a better chance of living than others would in my position because Fæ metabolize things, poisons included, with far less risk than others but…I've never been bitten by an Asp, so I've no idea about that one." In thinking about it, this really was a good idea to have for his own safety. At the same time, he could help Hilana get her hands on Asp venom for…whatever it was she intended to with it.

- - -

'Thoughts'

"Vallenor Tongue/Speech"

"Vastien Tongue/Speech"

"Valasren Tongue/Speech"

"Common Tongue/Speech"

[Hilana Chenzira]

“What they need is really more of a temperate sort of environment,” Hilana admitted. “They do really well across the seas where they get a full season of cold and they’re not quite in -this- heat. Some can adapt and do really well, but the gooseberries... not so much. Which is a shame, I really like them and they’re fun to make tarts and pies with,” the girl held her hands up. “Oh, well... maybe with Elementalism... with Wood... I can convince them to do better in the heat,” she smiled at the thought. “That is something I will have to ask your cousin about one day.” But chances were, the way they were managed in the greenhouse was just easier for all of them. Sure, it was a little extra labour, but they could go into the cold room at the back of the greenhouse for Frost, and start again in Glade. “So the natural environment is northern forests. Mostly deciduous, if I recall correctly, where they get snow for a season. Snow,” she smiled to think of it. She’d not experienced it herself, but she’d heard from those that had, and she wondered what it would be like to feel it as it actually came down on its own from the skies. Something so cold that it burned, and came down in great drifts and abundance.

The Vastiana listened with abject fascination as he spoke about his paternal half. Hilana had never had the opportunity to meet another Fae before Dominus Æros, though she’d rather thought she had seen one, or perhaps two, in Tertium. However, she had been with one of her elder sisters, and the opportunity to approach had been firmly denied. It wouldn’t have been appropriate for her to go on up to the laughing men with the exotic colouring, inasmuch as she wanted to, not when they had been putting so much effort into rehabilitating her reputation from years of stories that were more than a bit exaggerated by her family. Then again, it was hard to deny what she’d pulled as a child with the veil, and not to mention when she had raced Sakima against her father’s will despite being banned from the derby by him. Even if she had won her age group... the act of defiance was well-known amongst her family, and people talked. Even if her father had tried to keep it within the familial ranks; Hilana knew well that if there was any shred of gossip to be considered, it would be examined, picked apart, and spread around with even more embellishments. One reiteration from a Vastian man in one of the nightclubs was that he had heard she’d done the race in her undergarments. With stories like that... she had a difficult time understanding why her father even wanted to keep her there rather than the compromise her great-aunt had proposed.

Four Fae courts, four different Fae types, it seemed, and each was different from the others. She wondered if the ones she had seen years ago in Tertium were of Summer, because they’d certainly seemed to have been having a good time, but considering the attention... who knew? And yet, while she was fascinated by the new information that he was presenting her, she was watching him, too. The way he spoke, the way he said it... she saw herself in him. She heard herself in him, as he spoke about his parents and the pressure. The frustration, the feeling of being trapped and snared. Expectations and demands with no peace, no ability to explore and breathe and be. And he had no outlets of his choice to be able to explore and express his own energy and desires, his needs and wants and wishes. They were set for him, charted for him, all through his formative years. She didn’t have Mesmer to be able to listen to his Song, but because she was used to being Mundane, she had learned to get by the best she could. Inasmuch as she liked to talk, Hilana also strove to listen. His tone, his laughter, the way it came...

“I think parents like to try to build their children up... but sometimes... Those standards that they set do the opposite. Rather than inspire and lift you to new heights, they act as chains around us,” she was gentle. “My father is the type of man that could get along just fine with Consul Argenti. He would sleep soundly if an opportunity like that happened... what happened to Khyan’s family, I mean. But as for your mother and my father... well... they could probably find some common ground in their intentions for their children and the lofty goals and status that they want, for them through us, naturally. My father married each of my sisters off with other prominent Equestrian families to advance and secure more deals, status, whatever... and that’s what he wanted for me. And while marriage may not be something your mother has tried to force on you, she’s controlled every other aspect of your life until you put a stop to it the only way you knew how. I am sure if my reputation in Tertium wasn’t what it was, he most certainly would have had no problem trying to find a match for me amongst another Caste to keep on improving things for him. But I don’t think even he would have had the stones to attempt it with one of the Starborn,” she laughed. “That might have been a step too far, even for him. Especially since his youngest had no runes and had grown up feral. If I was my sweet and perfect eldest sister... maybe, but still an unlikely stretch beyond where he has any reason to think he may have success.”

“And this... this may sound blasphemous, and I mean no disrespect, Dominus... But you know... I think maybe you should let go of what your mother says about your blood. Hers, your fathers, what she feels that makes you, what she feels that you should be because of it. Cast it out, and let it go. My mother’s father, when I was 16... he told me that fear has two meanings. Forget everything and run... or face everything and rise. But if you run, they will never let you stop, and you will only die tired.” Her big dark eyes searched his. She wasn’t out to offend him, though she knew she was running the risk of doing so. Especially after he had been so kind to her. “Let go of the internalized expectations that they’ve led you to believe about where you should be and what you should be. They are only hurting you. Let them go. Let them fall and let their weight slip away. They should never have put that on you, but we cannot undo the past. All we can do is work from where we are, and change the ending to what we want it to be. It is time to stop running. You cannot see your own improvements because they have led you to expect so much more of yourself. A little of that is healthy, but the degree on which they make those demands... less so. Even if you do have a natural gift... you are beating yourself up for circumstances you could not control. Let it all go. Focus on yourself. That’s the only one to compare yourself to. Not whatever other noble house, not your sisters, not others of your cohort. The only one you need to compare yourself to is who you were yesterday, or the day before that. I can be competitive too, so I do understand. Use them as motivation if you must, but remember... it has to come from you.”

She did consider what he said about politics and the Founders, and those were decidedly tricky subjects. She had never had any inclination to get herself involved in politics, and why would she? Not only was her schedule busy enough as it was, it was a topic she knew precious little about. Hilana’s needs for attention had stopped thanks to a conjoined effort by her elders that looked after her in the herds, and trying to get involved with the affairs that governed the very lives and laws of everyone else was an awful lot of responsibility, it seemed. She may have been an adrenaline junkie, but politics was not her kind of thrill. There was a sacred duty to be considered there, though she knew a number didn’t feel the same way. City-dwellers... “May I ask why you’re interested in politics?” she was curious. “What do you find interesting about it?” For someone like him it would make far more sense, especially as one of Populus Ex-Re’ha.

“When it comes to the Founders, I don’t think you can go wrong with blood sacrifice,” Hilana admitted. “That is how I was taught, though. As long as someone loses something and it is offered to Them... They can receive it. That’s how I got these, anyway,” she indicated her bandaged abdomen and her upper arm, before reaching with one hand to pull up on the impossible amount of fabric that hung from her hips to expose another crisp bandage on her calf as well before letting the cotton fabric fall back into place. “The golden aoudads. There was a wild flock outside the city a few hours away, so I went and managed to catch two of the rams with Hayima’el to sacrifice... which is why I was so banged up when we met again in the Templum Solis Radians,” she added by way of explanation. “I hadn’t really had time to do a whole lot of treatment before then, but Vasilei helped patch me up after the Radiant Mass and then I had to make my own medicine,” the girl chuckled. “Still, it was worth it.”

Still, Hilana smiled at him when he offered to grant her the Rune himself in time. “I know you will,” she assured him when he said he would do his best to get there. “When you put your mind to something... when you have a goal... I would think that you are nigh unstoppable once you focus and get started. But whatever pace you go at is your pace. How fast you get there doesn’t hardly matter, so long as you do. What’s outside...doesn’t matter. Besides, Khyan’s a great teacher when he’s in the mood to do it and it’s a subject he knows. He’s taught me a fair bit, and I’ve only met him a few times... but he’s been very insightful.”

The girl, in truth, had no idea what way Elementalism would go for her. She held her hands up as if to say she had no idea. “Founders only know, I imagine. My mother was water. My second eldest sister is Air, the sister between her and I is fire. It’s commonly held amongst my mother’s family... all four elements are present there; my grandmother was also water, but her mother was earth... so it could go any which way. A shame that Wood isn’t one of those that could be Arche, because then I think there wouldn’t be any doubt, would it? Wild as I can be, who knows? I’ve been told I’m a hurricane encased in human skin, like my mother was...though worse, depending on who you ask,” she chuckled. But the revelation about one sister having fire as her Arche element suggested something that had to do with those faint scars on her arm, if her Symphony was anything to go by. But Hilana didn’t seem elaborate on it, either, but there was always another time.

“That is true, that if a couple commits to monogamy and one goes outside the relationship, then you’d think their ire would be aimed at the one who strayed, but when it’s matters of the heart... people get very complicated. It’s easy to blame those they view as ‘tempting’ their partner rather than face the fact it was the partner that chose to break their word. Better off not getting in the middle of something like that, as far as I’m concerned.” She was pretty sure he was right that there wasn’t much of anything she could force Æros into doing, short of very shady unethical plants, but even still, he was a Mesmer, he was going to learn Semblance, and further, she found in him a friend. And she wasn’t about to even try. But the idea of Khyan getting caught up like that, well, she found that funny if her Symphony was anything to go by. Usually, Hilana was the one who ran her mouth with Khyan, not the other way around, so it was a bit nice to know that it happened to him as well.

“I don’t know if it’s any consolation, but asps can do a dry bite. They can choose whether to release venom or not, so I’d think Khyan can too... but it doesn’t hurt to have something on hand to be safe. We have general blood cleansers in Sweet Remedies, mind, but everything in my training says that the specific antivenin of the species of snake that bit the victim usually works best.” Hilana told him. She hoped that those possibilities didn’t bother him too much; she didn’t want to upset either him or Khyan. “That being said, send him up when he’s yours, and I can get his venom and make the remedy and bring it back to you, and then you have it on hand in case, Founders forbid, an accident happens.”

[Aeros]

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As Hilana explained the proper habitat for the strange little glass berry, he found what dormant wanderlust lay within him once again stirring. He really did need to find a reliable traversion mage. Perhaps Finn was an option, though Finn was bound to Arvælyn, and while he was acquainted with both of them, Æros imagined that trying to always coordinate around both of their schedules might be…a little difficult. Because of that, it would probably be easier to find another option or so in scenarios where Finn was not available. Either that, or Æros might want to get the rune for himself at some point. In an ideal world, he'd collect every possible rune that wouldn't fundamentally warp him beyond repair.

"Mm, there's a lot of options when one begins to meddle around with Elementalism. You could also find ways to simply increase the overall yield from individual plants even if you cannot find a way to make it thrive in the desert environments. The greenhouse would care for it just fine and you would still gain. I am excited to see what creative manipulations you come up with, however." The Fæ spoke with an encouraging sort of enthusiasm, his words transparently sincere. Not only did the arcane manipulations interest him, but with increased efficiency of her plants, well…more fruit for him, no?

When he spoke of Fæ-ethelan and the Fæ Courts, he found his mind wandering off to what it would've been like to be raised among kin of his other half. Would it have been better or worse? Different, certainly, but what opportunities would he serve to have gained or lost? These questions had haunted him since he was a young boy; he would often posit that if his parents had switched anatomy, his life might be less dreadful. These daydreams often served as a form of escapism for the man and any time he thought about it now, it just filled him with a bitter sort of emotional pain. There was a longing within to wander away as his father had, but this was the only home he'd ever known. Chasing the unknown could lead to immense disappointment, of this he knew well, and if he left unsanctioned, he did not think his return would be very welcomed.

As the subject drifted to Æros comparing their present parents to one another, he listened along as Hilana responded, her words ringing true to him. Offspring were not much more than commodities here, unhealthy and unfortunate as it was. For some, this worked out– some people fit proper and grew into the molds their parents set for them, just like some slaves were treated well and managed to enjoy their lives. For others? It was stifling, oppressive, and the result was the air being choked from their lungs until they snapped in rebellion, submission, or became a husk of a person entirely.

In a society where people were nought more than property, parenting styles like this were not only mainstream, but they were often lauded or encouraged as the right way. That is…until the offspring break and the cracks start to show, as is the case with both of them. Their families equally have had to endeavor, bend over backwards, to cover up their behavior. Should they have been allowed to flourish naturally? Well, this elaborate dance of saving face would not have to be performed, but nobody would ever admit that. To question the system was to insult the society and those who ran it.

To his surprise, however, she spoke of his blood in a way contrary to anyone else he'd ever brought the subject up to. Many, in fact, most, were rather conflicted about him. He was an enigma– half Starborn, yet not fully Re'hyæn. To some, this made him lesser. To others, this novelty was greatly admired, often inspiring awe. In truth, however, neither of these perspectives were helpful. The royalty and other full elves would often scoff at him as if he were not actually one of them and then those below his caste would treat him as if he were some untouchable, distant constellation they could only gaze at. As such, he was left to feel othered by everyone– completely and utterly alone.

And in the whole of his life, nobody prior had ever said to look past what flowed through his veins. Nobody had bothered to treat him as an individual as opposed to a novel commodity, and why would they? That's all he was– even to the Founders themselves, as he had so very recently learned. He, himself, was nothing; the only thing of value in his possession was his blood. Æros had nothing else, and he knew that full well.

So when Hilana tried to look him in the eyes, he looked away, his lips pressed together in a line, jaw set. Not out of anger at her, but frustration and sadness that bowed inwards. It didn't matter what she thought or said or encouraged; anyone with any actual authority simply did not agree, and that was the way of things. His lips parted and eyes closed, sighing.

The Færie lifted an arm and ran a hand through silvery white hair as he shook his head, gathering his thoughts before responding. "A hopeful prospect, but unfortunately, my blood is all the value I have; it is all that I am. That extends far beyond my family, the rest of my caste, royalty– it goes all the way up to the very top." He paused, unsure, really, how to phrase his next point.

With a deep breath, he continued. "You know how I said I was too busy to go to the equinox mass for Varvara? That was true; I was…but that did not mean I did not pay her a visit. I was there with unpleasant company who bade me offer my blood, which I was more than happy to do as per my aforementioned point."

"And when I did, the world went black, and the man who accompanied me was possessed by none other than the Midnight Mother Herself. That interaction was truly humiliating, but it proved correct what I already knew: my existence outside of my blood is meaningless." Intentionally quite vague, Æros excluded any and all details about the surreptitious context surrounding his meeting with the rather pointed, lunar divine.

She showed him no empathy, though of course he had expected little, naturally. Æros hadn't even expected that She would ever speak to him at any point in his entire life, but to have had what skills he did possess along with his experiences and circumstances so easily cast aside by such a simple sin as a decorum faux pas, well, it proved his point in surfeit on top of crushing what was left of his ego. He as a person did not matter.

"It was my blood that had summoned Her, but my heart that turned Her away– I am now forbidden from seeking either of Them out." It had been excruciatingly difficult to speak those words smoothly, his voice desperately wanting to break, yet he did hold steady, tentative and slow as his speech was.

Because of that, to convince him that he even had the potential of value on his own? Not possible. Even if he were to live and rise, to flex power through æther over others, that still would not change. If he had value outside of his body and æther, it would be intrinsic. She would have given him even the smallest amount of grace. Because She did not, he would have to overcome what amalgam of weaknesses he currently had to make proper use of what tools he did possess; for these tools were what had value, not him. Only once body and æther were honed would any part of him matter– not before.

Æros had not actually internalized this quite yet until now; he'd never bothered to try and find value in himself outside of his blood, and in taking even but a second to consider the concept, the words Varvara had said echoed in his mind and cemented his pre-existing mindset. He felt quite sick as a result, deeply embarrassed and desperate not to let a drop of his despair show on his face. His hasty solution was to flex his Mesmer to flood his system with a sense of calm. It worked, but he felt hollow.

"Sorry, I…know that you're just trying to help but there are some things broken beyond repair." His normal speaking cadence was back and his voice was smooth; he sounded calm in an almost eerie sort of contrast to just before where he'd likely resembled a dam struggling not to break.

He shifted his thoughts back to something that evoked far less emotion in him, that of his potential forays into politics. "The lead branch of my family has a seat on the senate, and I've always held admiration for my uncle. Plus it would…help me feel a bit less useless to have a hand in the flow of things, I think. If I could simply do whatever I wanted, my ultimate goal would be to tip the tables in favor of what the Immaculists believe, but…one must do that ever so carefully lest one risk a terrible fate." Yet it would be ever so exciting to see what changes a more Immaculist influence might bring.

Regarding the Founders and blood, he kept the subject in the abstract, away from himself. "Blood empowers Them; that's what I was taught. I…am not entirely sure by what metric, be it the æther within or…other factors, I cannot say. All I can say is that while all blood is of some value, both source and volume can make exponential differences." Nothing was proven, at least not yet, but many a scholar had spent their lives dedicated to trying to figure out the ideal sort of offering and the elven Fæ was simply parroting what of their findings he had been told; his voice sounded a bit flat, a bit lifeless compared to the usual sort of drama he normally spoke with.

The mystery about Hilana's injuries was summarily demystified as the conversation went on, too. She had gone out of her way to fetch some rams, apparently. Æros looked at her with great empathy, pursing his lips into a bit of a frown. "Should you ever try to do something like that again, mind bringing me along? I've…a penance to pay and my Mesmer is nothing to scoff at; provided there aren't any outstanding circumstances, any potential sacrifice should bend to my will." Realistically, 'should' ought to be 'will.' Only creatures of legend, blessed by anti-magic, or similarly masterful magicians could resist him. However, it almost felt dishonest to speak of himself as if his prowess with his Craft held any meaning whatsoever. And yet, he did not want his friend out there risking herself, so he felt it was worth mentioning.

Æros bit the inside of his lower lip at the subject of advancing his Semblance, hesitant to make any promises on the subject. "Khyan is very good with both his Craft and with me, so I don't doubt he'll prove an effective teacher– it's just my headspace that…I am unsure of. I've had Masquerade for almost two years and only recently have been making progress, so I suppose it really depends…but the recent progress is…tangible." He sounded apathetic, uncaring, yet at the same time almost sad.

As the conversation shifted back to Hilana, Æros actually felt an immense amount of relief. Talking about himself only made him feel worse, apparently. "I believe you can have wood as an Arche element…you just have to attune yourself to it. I wasn't taught about doing this directly as the more advanced instruction regarding Elementalism was reserved for those actually with the rune when I was in school, but friends of mine told me if one were to attune oneself with additional elements, one could make them their Arche. It's just…complicated to do and most people don't know or don't bother. If I recall, the process involves traversing to the correct elemental plane…but I've no idea how to do that." He spoke with a focus as he recalled this information, though his voice shifted somewhat sheepish when he admitted his ignorance at the end.

It should be noted that there was a correspondence between her aforementioned scarring and the sister specializing in fire. One day, he'd have to get her to tell him about each of her siblings in more detail. Perhaps that tale would come part and parcel.

"True enough. I can't really even speak for myself since I've avoided close romantic bonds like plague in the past," and as sad as that sounds, he laughed at the sentiment as if it were genuinely funny. "...but objectively, if I strayed it'd be my choice, and that is precisely why he has nothing to worry about– nobody else's desires can sway me." Of this, the Færie spoke matter of factly.

Regarding venom, "I imagine the generic would work slower than the exact antivenin, so the effectiveness probably depends on both individual anatomy and venom potency, no? I do know venom, poison, disease…? All affect me less, so until I can convince him to part with some of his venom, the generic would be good enough to have on hand, I think– but I will endeavor to get you some, regardless." Æros laughed at the idea of convincing Khyan to extract such a thing, finding it funny.

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'Thoughts'

"Vallenor Tongue/Speech"

"Vastien Tongue/Speech"

"Valasren Tongue/Speech"

"Common Tongue/Speech"