Pay in Blood II
83rd of Searing, Year 108 of the Age of Steel
Part I
Part I
They always started innocently.
Veriel was standing on a beach. She knew exactly where it was. It was the one right outside of her house. The waves brushed against her feet and slowly sank deeper into the sand. The wind cheerfully played with her dark hair, sending it flaring behind her. The sun was bright, giving just the perfect amount of warmth. There was no way of telling how long she stood there. It could have been minutes, it could have been days. Her muscles did not ache, but it felt like an eternity had passed.
It would have been a perfect day had it not started raining. She felt a drop of water falling onto her cheek. Without even thinking, her hand went to her face to wipe it away. Veriel froze when her fingers came away red. She had seen that exact shade countless times before. It was blood.
Dread started to curl in the pit of her stomach. The scene in front of her slowed down and something told her to look her to look up. She already knew something terrible would greet her. Her heart tightened and when she did, a scream tore through her before she even realized it.
Ryo was suspended in the sky above her. His eyes were closed and his face serene, as if he was sleeping. She would have believed that if it wasn’t for the fact that his wings were gone and dark red blood was dripping down from his sides. The avialae seemed like he was so close, yet even with her arm raised as far as it would, she could not reach him. Then he started bleeding everywhere. His eyes, his nose, his mouth. It was an unthinkable amount of blood. His blood rained down on her and she couldn’t move. It quickly became a downpour, a waterfall of red that was trying to drown her. She could not breathe, not when the blood started making her choke.
Just as she believed she would die, the scene changed. The blood was gone. Ryo was gone. The beach was gone. Veriel was still suffocating, but she could finally move. Her hands immediately flew to her neck, trying to find what was constricting her windpipes. It was then she touched an unfamiliar hand that wrapped around her neck. Her vision suddenly focused and she saw a figure standing in front of her - as if he had been there all along. It was a face that she would never forget. Dark hair. A taunting smirk. Black wings. In his right eye socket where his eye should have been was black nothingness, blood dripping out of it like tears.
The one who took everything from her.
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Her eyes flew open and she immediately sat upright. Veriel suddenly shivered, realizing that she was covered in cold sweats. There was no one strangling her, yet for some reason, her lungs still struggled to get the air in. Her throat was parched and painful, unusually so. Her arms wrapped around herself without her mind telling them to. Instead of the total darkness she expected to be in, light peeked through where the door had been opened a crack. It was then that she spotted Laelithar who was already sitting on the side of her bed. His dark hair was tousled from sleep, yet his eyes were bright and alert, looking at her with concern.
A cold wash of relief flooded through her as her mind finally registered that this was reality. Whatever terrible images that were conjured up did not exist - well, not all of them anyway. Veriel looked at her companion and felt a pang inside her chest. She wished it was Ryo sitting there instead. If he was, then they would be close enough for her to smell the old books that always surrounded him, the sunlight that always clung to skin, the sandalwood and musk from the soap he always bought off one traveling merchant from Sangen. He would have pulled her into an embrace and let her stay in his arms until she calmed down. He would have told her about an old story about the death of an unknown god he had recently read from an old tome he had found during one of his expeditions.
His voice… She feared that one day she would forget it.
“You were screaming,” Laelithar said softly, finally breaking the silence and her conjuration of Ryo along with it - for a split second, she wanted to scream again. He wrapped a blanket around her shoulders as her body continued shaking. All his movements were deliberate and gentle, a man trying not to startle a wounded animal. His hand rested on the side of her face, his thumb carefully brushing away the tears that refused to stop spilling from her eyes.
They both knew the answer to that, so Veriel didn’t bother to reply. Instead, she closed her eyes and waited.
“Why aren’t you doing anything?” the siltori suddenly asked, her eyes flying open. She didn’t bother to explain. Laelithar would know exactly what she was talking about.
“You’re already doing better,” he started, saying each word carefully. He pulled away his hand, now looking at her more steadily. An emotion flashed through his face, but it was too fast for her to identify. “I don’t think you need it any-”
“I thought I was getting better too, but clearly I’m not,” she cut him off tersely. As she straightened, the blanket slipped off her shoulders and when he reached out for it, she grabbed his arm instead. “I still need it.”
Veriel had asked the Mesmer for an explanation before. Ryo was not the first loss she had experienced and he would not be the last. She had lost dear friends before, but nothing could ever prepare her for this. Apparently, there were traces of their connection in her mind, traces of Ryo himself even. The bond had fused itself as a part of her, even when the other receiving end was gone forever. He will always be a part of you and the pain will never truly go away, but it will get better, was what Laelithar has told her.
Some days the thought comforted her. Other days, she hoped that she could forget everything about him. This day was the latter.
Laelithar started shaking his head. “Veriel, it takes time. I can’t keep-”
“Can’t keep what?” she demanded, silver eyes flaring brightly as they finally locked into his. “You can’t keep using your magic to help me? Even though you know I’m hurting?”
“What my magic is doing is not helping you and you know this. It’s not good for you.”
She glared at him. “You don’t get to decide what’s good for me.” Before she could stop herself, the bitter words were already pouring out. “You had no problem taking my pain away when it served the Order, when I never agreed to it. You made me abandon Ryo and protect that fucking sword instead. But now, when I’m telling you I need you to ease the pain, that it hurts too much, you won’t even help me?”
It was a blade that she knew would strike his heart and struck true it did. The muscles in his jaw tightened and he looked away. Laelithar started to stand, seemingly determined not allowing her to bully him into agreement.
“Just do it. Please,” Veriel whispered desperately, hand snatching the hem of his shirt and clenching it tight in her fist. She looked up at him, lips trembling. “Laelithar, please… I- Don’t go.”
The male elf sighed defeatedly and sat back down. It was cruel of her to wield his guilt like that, but she just wanted the pain to stop and he was the only one who could do it. The nightmare slowly trickled out of her mind, slipping away even as she tried to grab at it. An unexplainable calm washed over her as his magic weaved its way into her mind. Her chest expanded with more ease and her tears slowly dried.
And for a while, Veriel could close her eyes and pretend everything was fine.