84 SEARING 121
The thing Thysbae loved most about the estate was the space.
There was so much of it. Too much, sometimes. In the faintest corners of his mind, the distress of so much space reminded him of home where there had never been space. The attic had been a small thing and so was he. So easy had it been to curl up there and disappear when his mother’s words grew to be too much. But the problem with that was that she knew where to find him and nowhere was safe. The dark was a suffocating thing that he had to contend with, hiding her presence if she so wanted it. That lack of space kept her close, and in return so was he.
But here, on the estate, he could sprawl out in the gardens. He could run the grounds with the hounds until he grew tired. Perhaps it was a temporary arrangement, but he had vowed to himself that he would make the most of it. Him, and the other little voices in his head. The nagging, hungry voices that had desired more but would contend with this.
He blinked, hooves clacking against the stone of the front steps. The half-breed had considered preparing a gift for his visitor, but it’d already been a feat to ask for this. And it wasn’t like the money he ever spent was truly his own. He sniffed, the head of a hound bumping against his hand. The entrance to the Monteliyet Estate was a sight to behold, and one that had taken by surprise upon his arrival. From the moment he had seen them, a heavy weight had been placed on him. Be good, the voice told him. You never know when this will all end, the other voice tacked on. They still reminded him, sometimes.
But, no — today was supposed to be a good day. He was having a friend over. A friend. Bae considered them friends, even if Florian did not share the same opinion. A shock of excitement forced his steps to the front gate faster. It probably wasn’t proper that he was meeting the other there, but it just meant that they would talk sooner and for longer on the walk down the drive leading into the estate.
“You’ve made it!” His tail wagged as the hound that had followed him down sat beside him. Alert, but making no moves to be aggressive. “Was the journey here difficult? Confusing? Did you get lost on your way?”
There was so much of it. Too much, sometimes. In the faintest corners of his mind, the distress of so much space reminded him of home where there had never been space. The attic had been a small thing and so was he. So easy had it been to curl up there and disappear when his mother’s words grew to be too much. But the problem with that was that she knew where to find him and nowhere was safe. The dark was a suffocating thing that he had to contend with, hiding her presence if she so wanted it. That lack of space kept her close, and in return so was he.
But here, on the estate, he could sprawl out in the gardens. He could run the grounds with the hounds until he grew tired. Perhaps it was a temporary arrangement, but he had vowed to himself that he would make the most of it. Him, and the other little voices in his head. The nagging, hungry voices that had desired more but would contend with this.
He blinked, hooves clacking against the stone of the front steps. The half-breed had considered preparing a gift for his visitor, but it’d already been a feat to ask for this. And it wasn’t like the money he ever spent was truly his own. He sniffed, the head of a hound bumping against his hand. The entrance to the Monteliyet Estate was a sight to behold, and one that had taken by surprise upon his arrival. From the moment he had seen them, a heavy weight had been placed on him. Be good, the voice told him. You never know when this will all end, the other voice tacked on. They still reminded him, sometimes.
But, no — today was supposed to be a good day. He was having a friend over. A friend. Bae considered them friends, even if Florian did not share the same opinion. A shock of excitement forced his steps to the front gate faster. It probably wasn’t proper that he was meeting the other there, but it just meant that they would talk sooner and for longer on the walk down the drive leading into the estate.
“You’ve made it!” His tail wagged as the hound that had followed him down sat beside him. Alert, but making no moves to be aggressive. “Was the journey here difficult? Confusing? Did you get lost on your way?”