Ash 2nd, 121. The Angevin Estate, Zaichaer
Jane felt a strange sense of closure as Stefan and Delia kissed, the feeling twisting in her gut as she joined the delicate applause that followed. She was not exactly sure why. Their friends and families surely felt the same, having been a much awaited union, but there was a note of bitterness to her own relief that was difficult to place. Whatever the feeling, it was unwise to unravel it at this moment and Jane instead focused the bright and joyuous atmosphere that enveloped the crowd. She glanced over to Carmen, who also seemed to hold a similar expression of mixed feelings. Jane could likely guess the thoughts behind it, but like her own it was best to be grateful for the invitation and to enjoy the reception as the joyous celebration as it was meant to be.
Clutching a small, white cardboard box, waxed and decorated with a golden floral filagree, she and her mother joined the line to offer their gifts and well wishes to the newly wedded couple. She tapped the box, pensive as she chose her words, while Carmen causally spoke to the others in line. Finally, they both approached Stefan and Delia, practically shining in all their splendor. Jane smiled first at Stefan and then Delia, givng her a gentle nod of recognition. In their youth, before Jane was sent away to Haqs, the Angevins had been common guests at the Farraway estate. Though Delia was somewhat older than her, she still humored her games during their visits. Aside from that, and especially after all those many years out of Zaichaer, they did not socialize deeply beyond the brief and rare occassions that they crossed the other's path. Jane recalled the Riverland Gala and how she and Stefan had spent the evening busying themselves with the exhibits, wondering, and dreading, if the now Mrs. Dornkirk knew or even minded. The warm glittering of Delia's eyes lacked a single ounce of resentment towards her which proved to be more frustrating than comforting. Regardless, Jane smiled, and was about to speak before Carmen swept in.
"Delia Dornkirk!", Lady Farraway said breathlessly, "Congratulations! I must say that you are, without a doubt, the most beautiful bride that Zaichaer has produced all year. It is so strange to think that you were once a little girl playing with my dear Camilla. There is no question that you will be a marvelous wife--and mother."
She then turned to Stefan, a wiry smirk barely concealed within a smile, "And congratulations to you as well, Sir Stefan Dornkirk. Your mother must be exceedingly proud. On that note, I believe I shall congratulate both Lady Silvana and Friederike while they are in a good mood"
Carmen laughed at her own joke and said her goodbyes, leaving Jane to speak with Stefan and his bride. She looked between the two, her eyes glistening, and held out the gift.
"Congratulations to you both! I'm so happy for you, Stefan--and Delia, I hope we can perhaps become more well aquainted. You may remember this from your visits to our estate."
Within the box was a handcrafted candy dish, topped with a delicate lid that radiated into a complex pattern of looping fractals that flowed down the bowl. It was crafted in Zeraphesh, made from their renowned glass that glimmered with exotic opalscence. It had once been in one of the drawing rooms of the Farraway estate and snagging one or two hard caramels was something of a routine for Delia and Jane during those visits. While the two young girls did not always agree on games, they could both appreciate candy.
"You were always so fond of this when we were children. I thought you might like to have it for your own drawing room."
Jane offered her parting thanks and excused herself to the powder room, though most would hesitate to call such that due to its sheer size. A long mirror, currently lined by a row of ladies as they fussed with their hair and make-up, covered the wall of a lounging area filled with plush sofas and tables containing tissues and minor toiletries for guests' use.
Weddings for all their glory were a time of grieving for some. Tearful ladies sat on the couches, dabbing their eyes with complementary tissues, lamenting the lost of Stefan Dornkirk from the roster of eligible bachelors. One in particular, Lady Annabella Striker, was especially shameless in her wailing as her older sisters attempted to console her.
"Why?! Oh, why?! I thought he liked me! We all went to that play, he kissed my hand! Oh, the letters I wrote! He just--he just--You thought he liked me too, right, Bethany?"
"Yes, Anna, yes, we thought so too", her sister flatly replied, her patience clearly thin.
More wailing followed. Jane grit her teeth and finally reached the ornate door of the small stall. Thankfully it was empty and she then found herself in dim solitude. That was when the tears that she had denied herself for so long came rushing out. She made no sound, forcing her sobs into strained breaths and letting her tears fall onto the floor.
Even now she was not sure why she cried. She was not in love with Stefan. There was never even a pretense of romance between them, and yet, there had been some hope, deep within thoughts that were too wild to humor, that perhaps a man like him could be with her. She then thought of Brenner, the wonderful visit they had shared during that day in Searing. The tears came harder now. What hope could there be with him, what hope could there be with anyone? And greater still, did she even want that hope? The posturing, the politics, the absolute banality of high society at large would be her prison while the promises of the Greater Institute would forever remain a forgotten dream. And yet even that was far out of reach, the Farraway's defunct pedigree forever haunting her. It was a game she had no chance of winning from the start, but was forever be forced to play. The cruelty of it all was unbearable.
A loud knock on the door startled her and she quickly composed herself. She avoided eye contact with the other woman as she passed her by, but she did not go noticed. Jane saw her reflection from across the lounge and it was clear why she had received the numerous stares. Her rosy skin was inflamed, her eyes red and watery with any trace of the makeup her mother had coaxed her to apply now cried away or smudged. She focused in on herself, ignoring everyone around her as she made her way to the mirror to at least make herself somewhat presentable. As she tucked away some stray hairs that had escaped her updo, Annabella snorted incredulously, her attention now on the creature she considered more pathetic than herself.
"Really?", she slurred, "As if YOU ever had a chance."
"I had more than some vapid play," Jane snapped. Annabella was instantly indignant for the sudden curtness, something that surprised Jane herself. She decided it was time to go.
The fresh air outside the powder room was welcoming and Jane hoped it would take some of the blush out of her cheeks. This hope was dashed as she abruptly crossed paths with Brenner Dornkirk of all people. Jane knew she had to have looked a mess and decided her best and only course of action was to pretend like nothing was the matter in the slightest.
"Oh, hello, Brenner. Congratulations, I'm sure you must be proud. The ceremony was truly marvelous.", They spoke briefly, but Jane was far too anxious to enjoy his usually charming persence.
"I know you must be busy, being the best man and all, so I won't keep you. My mother is also expecting me so I must be off--perhaps we can share a dance later."
Jane hurried off, somewhat guilty for cutting Brenner off so abruptly. Eventually she found her mother in the reception area talking with another widow, an elderly woman from a nigh extinct house. They both seemed to be mulling over a rather sizable family. Her mother brightened as she saw Jane, but instantly grew concerned. She placed a hand around her shoulder and gave her a warm squeeze.
"Oh dear, I've been exactly where you are right now. Such are the trials of a young lady...", she said with an affection that was still too condescending for Jane's tastes, "The best remedy for that is to look beyond. For instance, do you see that fair haired gentlemen?"
Carmen pointed to a lithe young man who Jane would have mistaken for a svelte lady had it not been for his garb. "That's the heir of the Michaelis house, Anton, I believe, "She turned to the widow she had been speaking with earlier, "Poor thing, I thought he was dead."
Jane overheard her and wondered if between his ghostly complexion and glazed eyes he really was dead. How fitting it would be that not even death could relieve a young heir of his obligations.
"Mother, I truly have no interest--", She began wearily as the old widow tucked a bony arm around hers and lead her to Anton. Apparently the woman was mutual friend with his family and introduced him to Jane. They grimly accepted each other as dance partners. His movements were well practiced but Jane found herself needing to guide them both away from waltzing into other pairs. Apathy was fashionable with young men, she reasoned, even at the expense of stepping on toes. As the conversation shifted to their interests, it was a great surprise to find that he was a student at the Greater Institute. They both touched briefly on their classes and while Jane did not know much about chemistry, Anton's musings had made her curious. Just as her interest was piqued, the song ended and they both parted ways to take other partners, as was expected, but not without promising to continue their conversation at a later date.
Brenner and she had found each other for the next dance. It was a slow song, much like the first dance they shared, something Jane could not help but remember. Time seemed to pass so quickly from the 15th of Searing to now. The expedition that he had mentioned during their visit loomed over her head; She knew that both he and his brother would be departing soon. As he held her hand aloft while they danced, she lowered her eyes and laced her fingers between his.
"I wish you the best of luck for your expedition. I trust that you will keep your men safe, but please take care of yourself. It would be a great loss to Zaichaer if you did not return...", Soon the dance was over. Jane excused herself from the floor and went back to Carmen, who chastised her for not giving more attention to the Michaelis heir.
Dinner was a bitter affair, though the food itself was excellent. She had found herself assigned to a table of strangers, though Carmen seemed to know most of them. They were guests who were not associated with any great house of Zaichaer, or like she and her mother, the few remaining survivors of houses long past their glory. The widow from earlier was one of this bunch and she talked and laughed far too loudly, spitting fine bits of lobster on the edge of Jane's plate. Jane wistfully gazed at everyone else she knew sitting with their families, wishing she could join them instead.
Eitan's toast caught the attention of the room and Jane listened as he sang the praises of Stefan and his sister, his usually stoic demeanor jubilant. That more than anything made an impression beyond his words, but they too struck her as he continued:
"Tonight is an ending for many things, but a beginning for more exciting things to come."
Jane reflected on this quitely and found herself able to smile, if not for herself, then for the friends she had made throughout the months. She raised her glass and drank, both for them and the hope she had for her future.