Hello Again [Rivin]

[Sivan]

10th of Glade, Year 122 Steel
Jacun's Alchemical Goods

Spring had sprung. Things had changed rapidly for Sivan as Kalzasi began to thaw. He moved around the shop with practiced ease. He knew this place as well or better than most, even as he was soon to move on to his own endeavors. At least, he would largely move on, though he was anticipating a shipment of daemethillium at the end of the season and wanted a seasoned summoner to help him make best use of it. He would also be working with Torin. He would also be catching what work he could whether as a summoner, an alchemist, or an artificer, though he was going to have to get back into that habit again. He had ignored the IX problem for far too long.

Not only had he learned alchemy from Master Jacun, but he had learned about tea and people. He still wasn't an expert, but his master had put him in the front of house so much that he had been forced to learn Common at a rapid rate and to learn to talk to people. Focusing on things he knew about helped.

Something wicked this way comes.

Sivan's head came up. Exael was often quite for days at a time, quietly observing, gathering context in order to understand how the world had changed since last it had been a part of this plane. The elf looked around, but the place was normal. There were tinkles of porcelain from the adjoining room where the usuals were sipping tea and talking. He almost asked internally, but then he understood. He was getting better at intuiting what Exael meant.

The Lysanrin-Dratori (and whatever else made up the mélange of his blood) had been lurking in his garden for some time. Attempting to bribe the sprites had been cute, but they had let him know of the invasion anyway. They were alert for such things since the break-in. He had bade them watch, but so long as he didn't damage anything or anyone, he could abide in the haven of the garden.

He had wondered if the man would ever knock on his door or find him at his work, especially given he might not work here nearly as frequently, especially if he could do smaller projects for Jacun in the space Torin would afford him above the forge.

I wish to make the Sacrament with you.

Perhaps when we are home, then.

A faint smile turned toward the door when he heard the tinkle of the bell.

Please don't manifest unless the demon does.

[Rivin]

Frost has been filled with deprivation, cold, loneliness, fear, and confusion. In almost every way that counted, it had been the best season of Rivin's life. In a real way, it had been the first season of his life. He had existed before, but everything that he had done had been decided by someone else. Even his acts of rebellion had been dictated by the confines of his captivity. They had felt like acts of daring and self-expression only because they had been forbidden. Even the disobedience itself was carefully confined to ways that were unlikely to be found out, or likely to be indulged if they were.

It had taken Rivin some time to fully realize the scope of his captivity and the effects it had had on his brain. Likely would forever have on his brain in one aspect or another. It was not surprising, but it was rather uncomfortable to know that, even when the one who had controlled the narrative of both his existence and his understanding of it, was dead, the conditioning would live on. He could fight it when he saw it, and he would likely see more of it the longer he lived free, but the fact that he would never be able to see all of it was something he would have to accept.

Accepting exceedingly unpleasant things was part of his training, which was useful. Not all of his training was harmful, in fact, a great deal of it seemed useful.

Adapting to the local customs was only as difficult as figuring out what they were due to his chameleon social training. His Galerian accent was harder to master, but he was working on it. When one had little to do in a day besides listen to other people speaking while obsessively worrying about being detected, one had plenty of time to assess vowel pronunciation. His Common was improving by leaps and bounds. According to his self-assessment log, he was learning twenty new words a day, some days, with the average being ten. He knew that keeping track of his progress was an attempt to feel both controlled and in control, but he couldn't logically find any harm in the practice, so he allowed it.

He had moved from one temporary lodging place to another every few nights since arriving, but had, as yet, not discovered anyone attempting to track or locate him. He had even made seasonal contracts with two spirits; a seeker spirit to fly around his vicinity, listening for anyone who was tracking or speaking about him, and a watcher spirit to warn him if anyone was following him. He could feel them now, the first flitting about within a block or so of him like an eager hound, the second hovering in the air a few dozen feet above his head like a sentinel. They were a comfort, but they were not companionship.

The demon in his head, because it was a demon and acknowledging that was important, was less comfort, and rarely spoke to Rivin. Rivin could speak to it, but the likelihood that the creature would answer, and the unsettling nature of that occurrence dissuaded him except when it was unavoidable.

The fact was that Rivin needed a contact. Someone who could help teach him, both about Kalzasi, and the life of a free person generally. Someone who could also aid in learning practical summoning would be a great asset as well. If that person was pleasant and non-judgemental, all the better.

Well... there were times when, despite fully knowing that it was a trauma response, he craved someone being judgemental. Someone judging him and giving him critiques without sentiment or gentleness allowed him to feel safe. It was a way in which he was broken, but there was nothing he could do about solving the issue or indulging it for the time being, so he could only endure.

Sivan Sunrunner had given him aid and not treated him poorly for either his accent or his oddity the very day he'd arrived in the city. The kindness of a stranger had, naturally, raised suspicion in Rivin but, after watching the other man almost obsessively and seeing no sign that he was in contact with anyone who might be hunting him, he was ready to reach out with a proposition.

Stepping from the street into a place of business was beginning to feel normal, since he'd had to buy anything he needed himself since arriving, so Jacun's shop did not throw him off. It was warm, and smelled a combination of science and tea, which was quite nice. His nose identified a dozen different chemical components, and at least a few alchemical ones that Ilex had used regularly in their work.

He knew Sivan was working today, because he had memorized his schedule, also he'd followed him to work that morning. So he walked over without hesitation, though not hurrying, to say,

"Good afternoon." He made the Dratori gesture of 'polite greeting', that also implied the idea of intention to make a business proposition. A lot of the gestures meant multiple things depending on the words, or even the body language that accompanied them.

"We met last late in the Frost season, at an inn." His use of Common was still too formal, but he didn't understand how to make it polite without the formality yet. "You offered to perhaps teach me of Summoning. I am wondering if that offer is still available? I am able to compensate for the lessons."

He probably should have asked after the man's health, or attempted to make small talk of some kind, but those were the sorts of things he needed Sivan for, and attempting to pretend to be better than he was would not help his teacher.

[Sivan]

"Good afternoon," he replied in Common, though it was accompanied by Rivach gestures—surprise, but not unwelcome surprise; welcome; acceptance. "I remember you, Rivin. Welcome to Jacun's Alchemical Goods."

The question wasn't exactly a surprise, but it certainly came at a good time. He had already discussed working with Torin, as well as continuing to do some contract work for Jacun, when his apprenticeship was complete later this season, but teaching was also something he thought he could do, especially after having some success teaching Urs and helping Torin integrate Semblance into his life.

He nodded.

"My apprenticeship here will end this season. I will be doing some work with Master Jacun still, and some work with Torin Kilvin at his forge. But I will have time available to teach as well." He knew enough about how to run a business now that he could negotiate a fair rate for teaching. He didn't get the impression that Rivin wanted a master-apprentice relationship, but rather a transactional sort of thing. A glance toward the back door told him what he already knew, that Master Jacun wasn't around. He didn't suppose the man would fault him for doing side business while also keeping things running up front.

His eyes turned back to Rivin.

"What did you have in mind?" he asked. "A curriculum or weekly lessons or...?" Sivan tried to leave it open-ended. He didn't have a firm schedule after his apprenticeship was completed anyway. "Anyway, I suppose you could come to my house for them. Plenty of spirits on hand, and I like to think it's comfortable." He didn't mention that Rivin already seemed to agree on that point.

[Rivin]

The young alchemist used multiple gestures per sentence, or even per word, sometimes. Rivin's mind had, when he'd read the books available about the language, for some reason assumed that there would be only one per thought. Now it was easy to see that there was no reason to limit it. He would have to grow to know them more instinctively so he could flash them with the demonstrated practiced level of ease.

More educational goals would be added to the list.

He blinked at the idea of an apprenticeship ending. Of course they ended. The purpose was to teach and prepare a student for their own careers in the chosen profession. A person did not stay and study under their master their whole lives. Only slaves did that.

He should give some form of congratulations but the only time he had ever done so had been sarcastically, or at least subtly mockingly when Ilex had wanted to humiliate someone publicly. None of that seemed even mildly situationally fitting so he skipped over the social grace and said instead.

"It is good to hear that you will have available time." He tried, somewhat successfully to make it sound like he meant that Sivan having more time off was good and that the statement hadn't been wholly due to how the situation would benefit Rivin.

At the further inquiry, he stepped forward, trying in vain to keep his tail from twitching nervously. When he was close enough to be heard speaking in a quieter tone he did so,

"The situation, my situation, it is." He cut off abruptly here, knowing what information he needed to impart but not knowing how to ensure it would be received between the awkwardness of his situation and speaking in his second language. Starting over he tried to tell it like a story.

"I am foreign, as you know. I am not used to this city, this language, or the culture of these people." He glanced around, though there were no other people in the alchemical section of the shop, he hoped he would imply the way Kalzasian people in general lived.
"My upbringing was unconventional, which has put me at several additional disadvantages and, being not from here yourself I thought that you might be able to answer questions and perhaps give lessons when I discover what it is I am supposed to know."

Not knowing what one did not know was the worst place to start, but that, it seemed was a theme for Rivin.

"If you are not interested in that, or if you are, I will still be in need of Summoning training. I have grasps of the ideas, but, much like Rivach, I have little practical experience."

He had done many extremely minor bindings, and, according to what he'd read, he was powerful, but he was not skilled. He had no idea how to perform a ritual binding, or form a contract that had more than one term, or lasted for any significant length of time.

[Sivan]

Sivan considered him and the proposal for a little while. Perhaps he seemed intimidating, his features a mélange of elven bloodlines, his thoughts kept mostly to himself, his feelings shared with precious few. He didn't intend to be so; he was just thinking things through, and arguing with a certain Celestial, as well. Finally, he nodded.

"I'll be done in about an hour," he said. "Stay a while, or at least meet me back here by then."

In an hour, he was done, Jacun willing to close up shop when he was done going over something at his desk. Sivan offered a tentative smile to Rivin, and then guided him toward his home. He wasn't normally chatty, but he played tourguide as they went the short distance from the shop to the green-roofed two-story (and going on three) building shouldering its way up between finer buildings. If Rivin was going to learn from Sivan, it was likely he would spend a fair amount of time in the Plaza of Jeweled Arches between his home and other places that he went.

He observed how the strange man seemed to take in data and file it away in his mind. Through his Rune, he could sense new energy trickling through, making new patterns of connection. That was what learning felt like, he supposed.

As he approached his home, he waved toward the neighboring house. A fine elf was peering out the window, and waved back before disappearing.

"My neighbor Laurevere Val'Istra. Nobleman from Sol'Valen. Nice sort for all that. Teaching me the blade so I can defend myself. We get burglers and such up here."

Sivan let Rivin into his home, gave him a bit of a tour, both the upstairs, and the downstairs, and the cellar, where he did much of his summoning work. Then he fed him, simple, easily prepared food, the remains of his winter store ere the first springtime foods became available from his garden and the market.

Then he led him out back to the garden, which was not new to the man, but they were going to pretend it was.

"I do most of my wild summons out here, and just... spiritwalking with the ones who exist on this plane." He had already explained how his earth elemental was making the building grow while they were dining. Rivin could surely sense through his Rune how the spirits were strong here, content in the sanctuary he had built for them, that they had helped him build. The bees sang drowsily. So too did the spirit of the hive.

"Anyway, I suppose you can watch me make my Sacrament. I've waited this long so I can do it properly and still work with spirits in the other spheres, or courts." He peered curiously at Rivin. "One can bind to an aidolon earlier, but one must bind to their sphere in that case... which closes one off from the others. Do you know if you can bind spirits other than infernals, or has it closed you off to them?"

[Rivin]

The Lysanrin nodded at the suggestion of additional conversation to arrange lessons after the elf's current work was finished.

Logically, going to sit among the patrons and have a warm drink was perfectly sound. But it felt odd, as he walked, attempting an easy, casual gait, into the room and ordered the first tea he recognized. Serving this also seemed to be Sivan's job, which felt a little awkward, but he took his drink and sat. The room was comfortably warm, smelled like the brewing of things, and was filled with the quiet conversation of the others.

Had Rivin been someone else, he would probably have relaxed and enjoyed the atmosphere. Being Rivin, he tried to look like he was, only to realize that he was beginning to succumb to the desire to release his tension in truth, and wasn't sure how he felt about it.

The little smile his would-be teacher offered him was so genuine that it made Rivin want to return it honestly. This made him realize that he didn't know how to have honest expression while in the company of other people. This made him wonder if he had genuine expressions when he was alone or if he had forgotten how sometime in his early youth. As they walked across the city he tried to remember when he'd begun controlling his face around his mother. She had always been composed and controlled, even in his earliest memories. Had he ever seen an expression from her that wasn't intentional? Had he ever seen one on Ilex that wasn't?

The thoughts had started as a logical puzzle, but as he continued down their path they made him feel suddenly and deeply lonely.

Trying to push down the ocean of unwanted emotion he trotted a few steps so he was walking beside Sivan instead of a few feet behind and devoted his attention to the tour. It ended with an introduction to Sivan's neighbor's house, though the neighbor himself only waved. Rivin had looked into the older elf, since he seemed to insert himself into Sivan's life regularly. While there appeared to be no connection whatsoever with Ilex or the Empire, there was something else. It was like a scent, lingering, some form of intrigue that Rivin had not enough knowledge to grasp hold of. He intended to let it be, unless it began to affect him in some way. The less involved he was in the personal intrigues of others the less likely he could be tangled by then.

He knew the layout of Sivan's home, but it was interesting to be seeing it from the inside with his own eyes. It was spacious while still retaining a cozy feel. Rivin liked it. There had been houses he had liked more than others while he'd grown up, and the ones he'd liked the most had a similar feel to then. Though he now recognized that those houses had been the potential of this feeling, while Sivan's realized it.

Sitting down to eat the simple food projected a similar kind of comfortable coziness. It drew him in and saturated him with a sort of ache. A sort of longing that he wasn't sure he liked but also instantly felt protective of. The conversation was about what the elf was having his bonded sprites do to his home. Rivin was surprised and tried to let it show, though obvious expressions were difficult. The sorts of things sprites could do was a new scope of the rune for him. He had never considered forming a contract that involved more than the very basic aspects of a sprite. Watcher sprites as guards, fire sprites to warm a space or light kindling.

When the meal was finished and he was led into the garden that he had spent more time in since arriving at the city than likely any other single place, he breathed in its scent without being obvious about it and sent out little greetings to the spirits and sprites. They tolerated him, which was surprisingly better than the obsession or shunning he got from most wild spirits.

"You would let me watch?" His hands signed 'hesitation' and 'honored', quietly by his sides. It seemed like such a personal thing, and one he knew nothing about. Having made a sacrament of his own and retaining no memory of it felt like... Well, he'd never had sex either that he was aware of, but if he found out he'd done that and had no memory of it, it might feel similar.

When Sivan responded in the affirmative he felt a tugging from inside himself to respond with something equally personal so he said,

"I can bond different types of spirits still, so I must have done it once I was strong enough." It was half a question but he left it without answer and continued, looking down at his hands briefly,

"I do not remember my Sacrament. I... I lose time, sometimes. My mother, she told me it was a thing of my father's blood." Sivan had similar blood, perhaps he would know what it was and how to control it.

[Sivan]

"It would please me if you would sit vigil," he said in Rivach, the words careful and measured, the gestures accompanying them clear and concise. Sivan didn't think Rivan was fluent, and so he did his best to educate without embarrassing him.

The elf realized he would be somewhat vulnerable. Exael was the strongest spirit with whom he had an accord, and it would be invested entirely in the bonding ritual. But the other spirits, the bees, even the squealmouse would likely come to his aid if they thought violence had come upon him in the sanctuary they had built for him. He didn't wish harm upon Rivin, and could only hope he didn't wish harm upon him. Exael didn't trust him because it didn't trust the demon within; Sivan was maintaining that they weren't one being.

"If I am to teach you, we must establish trust. Yes?" He considered. "I think it is good you haven't closed off the other realms. It can be a faster road to power, but more can be gained by patience... there is more utility in variety."

Barefoot in the moss, he found a spot that was comfortable and sat, a hand inviting Rivin to do the same in an echo of Rivach.

Sivan grimaced.

"The berserker rage, yes," he said quietly. "It afflicts the Dratori... an echo of the magic that separated us from our Hytori kin." His head cocked to the side. "You ought to be careful of that, as well. An infernal could use it against you. Perhaps we ought to work on meditation, as well? If you wish. I find it helpful for going into negotiations with spirits as much as to prevent a rage... They can be vexing, and losing one's cool will only work against one in a negotiation..."

[Rivin]

The half-breed lowered his head once in assent, it felt better than nodding and no appropriate words came to him. The solemn gesture was the best he had. His life had been a steady march of making due with the best he had in all realms of his reality, and he did not feel particularly lacking in the moment. Simple things that meant much felt correct in the setting.

Correcting himself to the setting and those within it was a skill Rivin had developed in his early life. The fact that his life was now split into two halves, bisected, was beginning to settle inside him. It was dangerous to believe that this new life was his and would remain so, but he could allow himself to see and accept the extremity of the difference between the two.

It was odd that Sivan would trust him with something so personal so quickly, but, then again, perhaps in this new world, it was not. People had trusted Ilex with much that they should not have with ease. Ilex had used them but rarely in ways that they were able to realize. Burning bridges was not something the doctor had been interested in. Could Rivin use this incident? Did he need to? He was being offered everything he required from Sivan already. He would tuck the idea away and examine it later.

Sitting down when gestured to do so he nodded, again just once,

"I also am glad to be able to use all the kinds of spirits still," That he could have easily been cut off from them, all without his awareness did not sit well, "though I have only made contact with those of nature to any extend worth speaking of."

Ears and mind perked at the mention of their shared Dratori blood, when Sivan said all that he seemed to be going to Rivin grimaced and shifted where he sat.

"I am as careful as I am able." Eyeing the other man he hesitated but went on, speaking slowly. "When I am threatened, or made helpless, I can try and fight it but... it comes."

Clearing his throat he paused again before deciding that his would-be teacher was right; trust had to be established. Unconsciously his voice lowered, as though the demon that rode inside his skin might now hear if he was quiet,

"I think the demon had made its compact with the part of my mind that comes out when I see red and lose time."

The words made him feel vulnerable, as his squirming showed.

[Sivan]

"Ahh," he acknowledged after a moment to consider. "Then we must give you the tools to ensure that the infernal doesn't make you its slave."

Sivan didn't really intend to sound threatening, but it was certainly the goal of most infernals to enslave whichever summoner pulled them through. Even celestials could sometimes be bullies when they felt they were right. And even as experienced as he had become, the elf still didn't know what most of the eldritch creatures wanted.

He offered a small smile that he hoped was encouraging; it was clear Rivin wasn't comfortable sharing, but if he was sharing, then it meant there was at least a thread of rapport between them. Exael might still be overreacting when it came to an infernal, but Sivan was trying to ensure in his own way that Rivin retained his agency and the infernal did not have its way with the material realm.

With a deep breath, he steadied himself, and magical energies began to spool out of him in complex circles and coils, glyphs and sacred geometry. Some of it was him; some of it was Exael. They had learned how to work in tandem, and the Sacrement between them would only codify that, strengthen it. The celestial appeared, a creature of light giving only hints of its true form.

A great deal was happening, and few summoners developed the level of skill to enact this level of bond without foreswearing the other courts. The bees grew quiet, as did the spirits that had so happily been coexisting in the elf's enchanted sanctuary. They could sense a momentous shift occurring in the surrounding aether.

Sivan felt himself changing, and while he didn't feel safe, now he too felt vulnerable in front of this relative stranger. But he tried to have faith in what he was doing, in the tenuous relationship with the strange man, and with his own power, which would grow monumentally just as soon as this was complete.

[Rivin]

It didn't make sense.

Lessons for pay made sense. An exchange of information that would enable Sivan to teach him more effectively, while not comfortable, made sense. Sivan allowing Rivin to watch as he created what would likely be the most important and intimate connection of his life, did not make sense. More than watch even; in minor ways, to participate.

The fact that Rivin did not remember his own bonding was something to worry at, rubbing over the empty space in his mind in quiet moments, hoping uselessly that simply seeking might render up answers.

Even as his mind ran over and over their previous interactions, looking for a reason for the sudden jump in vulnerability, he moved to take the place indicated. All the vigils he had sat before had been his own. The last night he spent with his mother, the night before he was given his rune, the night before he fled. All of them felt sacred, not something that could be spoken of, so he didn't ask questions.

Taking deep, even breaths, the Lysanrin settled into a light meditation, as his mother had taught him, to commune with spirits. It seemed fitting, to give this small vulnerability in exchange for the greater one being offered. He could enter the trance in a lesser way, still see what happened but remain physically alert, in case...

Well, in case of anything. Sivan would be physically unable to defend himself during the process, or so Rivin imagined. The realization that he would defend his teacher was new, and interesting. He filed it away for later examination and let his mind drift even as it concentrated.

A minute shiver passed through the slim body, rippling down his spine and the length of his tail. This was... well, it was like having been unconscious through his wedding night and then being allowed to watch someone else's. It was intimate, private, and fascinating. He wanted it, but would never have asked for it.

His eyes were able to see the eddies of power, flowing around the circle, forming lines and curves, symbols he knew, and ones he didn't. Mind working over time, he tried to memorize them while using the ones he knew to extract meaning from those he did not. The other spirits in Sivan's thrall grew quiet and distant, but Rivin could feel them watching; peeking out from hiding like mice in a storm.

Something in Rivin tingled at the amount of power being used, stretching out as though to touch it, or drink from it. Pulling harshly till the urge and the reaching retreated back into his breast. Whatever that part of him was, he would not allow it to interfere as it had, on rare occasions, done with the little magics the healer mages has performed on him.

All in the material plain had stilled, and all in the aetherial seemed to churn and move. The Lysanrin's eyes reflected the colors and light, almost mimicking them until, like the crescendo of a song, they all settled, someone, in an instant. Like a bell rung, clear and perfect, Rivin felt it, when the celestial came home.