Ash 1, 122
Norani closed her diary, a new book she got yesterday in preparation for this trip. She looked up, seeing the sun starting to rise over the distant mountains. She felt a little bit better after writing in the book. She glanced back over at her shoulder, seeing Yeva there still sleeping. She'd be up soon, stirring as much as she had been. Norani cast her eyes back forward, looking from her platform over Nora. She was leaving all of this. It was beautiful, the way the shadows of the grass lands stretched across the deep blue lake, how the sunlight broke through, sending them scattering. To the east, the deep, grey mountains, barely a blur, and to the south, the deep green jungles.
A hand set upon the branch fungus that her hut was built upon. She was thankful to have this space, first for Yeva, and then for herself. Her family had been concerned when she had it built, thinking it was a strange phase. And for the couple years since then, Norani had barely ever used it. She just had thought it would be fun to have.
But it made a space for Yeva.
And she knew that Yeva loved having a space she could go to be alone. If anything, the last half season or so, Norani felt that she had been imposing a bit on Yeva, using a space she'd given her friend. Soon, she'd be leaving it behind for a year, maybe more. She looked over at Ruvaf, also stirring in his nest made from the dried grasses around them, smiling softly.
No, she was simply making new memories, with her new family. One she chose. One who wished to be with her.
One who wouldn't lie to her.
With a mild grunt, she stood herself up. She'd never been on a real ship before. No one sailed on Nora, barely anyone even rowed. Most just swam. This could be fun. It would be fun. She wanted it to be fun, if not for herself, than for Yeva. She knew how important traveling and learning was to Yeva, and she didn't want to be the fleas in her dress. She turned to look back in the hut, the rising sun behind her as she pushed through the stringed beads, a soft smile on her face as she watched Yeva for a bit.
Norani wouldn't have made it to this point without Yeva, she was sure of it.
Quietly, Norani began to tiptoe around the hut, making the final preparations for their departure. She didn't see the Door yet, so she still had time. She was knelt next to the bed, slowly sliding out a travel pack, when she stopped, seeing Yeva's serene, sleeping face there, facing her, having rolled over.
Norani swallowed to abate the tightening in her throat that was spreading across her chest. She crawled into the bed they shared, sliding beneath the thin sheet that gave comfort but no warmth on the hot Searing nights, facing Yeva. Her free hand rested on Yeva's freckle covered bicep, and a deep green flush spread across Norani's cheek bones and the tips of her ears as she closed her eyes. She started to lean forward, to touch her nose to Yeva's. She was a breath away.
And she stopped.
Shame overwhelmed her, a fairly new emotion for the young woman.
Not like this.
She took her hand off of Yeva, and slid back out of bed, as her shame opened up to guilt, and she put herself back to work prepping for their trip. She was less quiet now, part of her hoping Yeva would wake soon. She turned away from the sleeping elf, dropping to a seated position, her back resting against the bed, her face burying into her palms, tears falling quietly off her face.
This was not an uncommon sight for Yeva to discover after the last season.
Norani's guilt grew as she inwardly beat herself up. She had almost sought to take from Yeva, just to dull the pain she felt. To feel anything else. As she cried, she wondered if maybe Yeva might be better off without her. If maybe she wasn't strong enough to protect Yeva from everything in this world, herself included. If maybe Yeva shouldn't put her trust in her. She wasn't worth it.
She was just someone worth lying to.
