Norani's Diary

[Norani]

Ash 1, 122 following Veridian & Scarlet

The sun has not yet risen and I cannot sleep on this night. You're sleeping beneath the window, the moon shining upon you as it does every night, watching over you. We leave for the Duck today, and I am terrified. I'm afraid of leaving my home, and I'm afraid of staying. If I stay, will I ever recover from this pain in my heart? If I go, will I ever be able to return home? What will I do if I don't want to come back?

I am so glad you have been here with me. My heart feels like a storm, winds changing direction always, and I feel lost in it, but you still shine through it all. I am not alone, this I know, more than I know much else. I wish I had the strength to find my way out of this storm, but right now I do not. Too many things here in Ounokt Nora bring me pain now. Yesterday, I saw my favorite spot to sit and draw upon the upper branches, and I wondered if Juno was there too, once upon a time. And then I'm angry, so angry, to have her name stolen from me. Not by the Unknown, but by the family-around-me.

I'm scared of what today will bring. Smiling is hard, tears are easy, and when the family-around-me became strangers in my heart, I find myself afraid of other strangers too. Will they lie too? Will I think they are, even if they are not?

I can hear you rustling in bed. You've slept nervously this night. You do that sometimes. I think you'll wake soon.

How much of who I am was taken by the Unknown? Is the person I know myself to be all a lie?

I wish I could remember her. My heart hopes that you would be friends with her, and her with you.

I carry your lotus upon my heart now, so that I will never lose how I feel about you.

I hope I can heal while we travel, so that my heart can say what I feel. I am a coward, weak, and small, a child, but I don't know the way out of the storm, not yet.

I am happy with you, even when I am not happy.

The sun is peeking over the mountains now. You'll wake up soon. I'm scared to go on this journey, but I want to go on it, with you.

[Norani]

Ash 1st, following A New Adventure Together

I’m settled into my room now. Though calling it a room would be quite strange. It’s a lake, like home, a sky overhead, tall grasses. It’s comforting, both familiar and foreign, known and yet new. I hope you’re enjoying your room.

I’ll miss your warmth this night.

I’m thankful you helped lift me from my sorrows this morning. I know it means something different to you, but to me and my people, touching noses is reserved for those who hold your heart. I’ve heard foreigners do something similar but with their lips.

That was my first time doing that with anyone, and I’m so happy it was with you. Sometime I’ll be brave enough to tell you exactly what I feel, though I think you know. It is hard, feeling these things and not knowing how you might feel in return. Scarier than facing a flying grass lion, that’s for sure.

But no, not really. Nothing about you is scary, to me. I know that anything I share with you is cherished and held precious by you. Because you’re truly a good and kind and caring person. So I will tell you when I’m brave enough, strong enough, healed enough, I know this.

I love you.

I hope you sleep well this night, the first night of our journey.

[Norani]

Ash 2, 123, viewtopic.php?t=3648

I woke early today, though I slept better than I expected. I think coming here was the right choice for me, for us both. I went for a swim today. I've never swam in the seas before. Ruvaf went hunting while I did, and he filled his belly so much he could barely move off his roost later. These seas are incredibly plentiful.

It was strange, there were no winds today. One of the sailors called this a doldrums, a strange phenomena on the ocean when there's no wind at all. And that meant simply waiting and letting the water carry the ship as it wished.

While swimming, I met a young girl, Kaiko. She's a Sea Rathari, so she was out swimming as well. She made me smile, which surprised me. Something about her cut through the... guarded nature I've held in place against strangers here. I spoke with the waters here, there are so many voices in the sea, very different than Nora, which is one big, deep voice. But the waters here accepted me readily.

It's interesting, Kaiko has never been in freshwater, just as this was my first time in salt water.

I got angry at the mention of the Captain. My anger scares me, it comes on so suddenly, so hotly. It never did that before. I am... ashamed.

I don't like this.

Kaiko introduced me to something called a jellyfish. Very painful stings. I bonded with it through my Animus rune, so I can transform into it now. I should show you sometime! I've never really practiced that magic around you. Kaiko blushes in embarrassment like you do. It's endearing. I learned how to breathe water through my skin, like the jellyfish does.

I saw a bunch of terribly scary creatures, huge, fast, big teeth, called sharks, all eating upon the corpse of something called a whale. These sharks seem like they would be really dangerous to be around in the seas, but like many predators, don't hunt if they have a full belly.

There's so much more to the seas than I could have ever realized. I feel like I could explore it for years and still have so much to learn. We should try it together sometime, I think I can make it so you can breathe underwater too, for a little while at least.

That could be fun, right?