Frost has been filled with deprivation, cold, loneliness, fear, and confusion. In almost every way that counted, it had been the best season of Rivin's life. In a real way, it had been the first season of his life. He had existed before, but everything that he had done had been decided by someone else. Even his acts of rebellion had been dictated by the confines of his captivity. They had felt like acts of daring and self-expression only because they had been forbidden. Even the disobedience itself was carefully confined to ways that were unlikely to be found out, or likely to be indulged if they were.
It had taken Rivin some time to fully realize the scope of his captivity and the effects it had had on his brain. Likely would forever have on his brain in one aspect or another. It was not surprising, but it was rather uncomfortable to know that, even when the one who had controlled the narrative of both his existence and his understanding of it, was dead, the conditioning would live on. He could fight it when he saw it, and he would likely see more of it the longer he lived free, but the fact that he would never be able to see all of it was something he would have to accept.
Accepting exceedingly unpleasant things was part of his training, which was useful. Not all of his training was harmful, in fact, a great deal of it seemed useful.
Adapting to the local customs was only as difficult as figuring out what they were due to his chameleon social training. His Galerian accent was harder to master, but he was working on it. When one had little to do in a day besides listen to other people speaking while obsessively worrying about being detected, one had plenty of time to assess vowel pronunciation. His Common was improving by leaps and bounds. According to his self-assessment log, he was learning twenty new words a day, some days, with the average being ten. He knew that keeping track of his progress was an attempt to feel both controlled and in control, but he couldn't logically find any harm in the practice, so he allowed it.
He had moved from one temporary lodging place to another every few nights since arriving, but had, as yet, not discovered anyone attempting to track or locate him. He had even made seasonal contracts with two spirits; a seeker spirit to fly around his vicinity, listening for anyone who was tracking or speaking about him, and a watcher spirit to warn him if anyone was following him. He could feel them now, the first flitting about within a block or so of him like an eager hound, the second hovering in the air a few dozen feet above his head like a sentinel. They were a comfort, but they were not companionship.
The demon in his head, because it was a demon and acknowledging that was important, was less comfort, and rarely spoke to Rivin. Rivin could speak to it, but the likelihood that the creature would answer, and the unsettling nature of that occurrence dissuaded him except when it was unavoidable.
The fact was that Rivin needed a contact. Someone who could help teach him, both about Kalzasi, and the life of a free person generally. Someone who could also aid in learning practical summoning would be a great asset as well. If that person was pleasant and non-judgemental, all the better.
Well... there were times when, despite fully knowing that it was a trauma response, he craved someone being judgemental. Someone judging him and giving him critiques without sentiment or gentleness allowed him to feel safe. It was a way in which he was broken, but there was nothing he could do about solving the issue or indulging it for the time being, so he could only endure.
Sivan Sunrunner had given him aid and not treated him poorly for either his accent or his oddity the very day he'd arrived in the city. The kindness of a stranger had, naturally, raised suspicion in Rivin but, after watching the other man almost obsessively and seeing no sign that he was in contact with anyone who might be hunting him, he was ready to reach out with a proposition.
Stepping from the street into a place of business was beginning to feel normal, since he'd had to buy anything he needed himself since arriving, so Jacun's shop did not throw him off. It was warm, and smelled a combination of science and tea, which was quite nice. His nose identified a dozen different chemical components, and at least a few alchemical ones that Ilex had used regularly in their work.
He knew Sivan was working today, because he had memorized his schedule, also he'd followed him to work that morning. So he walked over without hesitation, though not hurrying, to say,
"Good afternoon." He made the Dratori gesture of 'polite greeting', that also implied the idea of intention to make a business proposition. A lot of the gestures meant multiple things depending on the words, or even the body language that accompanied them.
"We met last late in the Frost season, at an inn." His use of Common was still too formal, but he didn't understand how to make it polite without the formality yet. "You offered to perhaps teach me of Summoning. I am wondering if that offer is still available? I am able to compensate for the lessons."
He probably should have asked after the man's health, or attempted to make small talk of some kind, but those were the sorts of things he needed Sivan for, and attempting to pretend to be better than he was would not help his teacher.
